Fatherís Day is here but believe it or not, it isnít a happy one for everybody.
Know what I have discovered? There is not a ďdysfunctionalĒ section in the card store. I have looked. It doesnít exist.
There are cards all around for those fortunate to have any kind of relationship with their fathers. So where can you find that perfect card for the estranged father?
ďThanks for being so distant and uncaring dad. Happy Fatherís Day!Ē
ďTo a father who is never there. Have a great day!Ē
ďThereís no father like you! Thank Goodness!Ē
Itís hard to cope with this day when you and your father donít get along. Itís quite a dilemma. The Bible tells us to ďhonorĒ our parents but itís tough when there is nothing to honor. What to do when youíve been abused or emotionally disconnected from him?
A Catholic priest tells the story of a nun who worked in a men's prison. One day, she said, a prisoner asked her to buy him a Mother's Day card for his mother. She did, and the word traveled like wildfire around the prison. Deluged with requests, she called Hallmark Cards, who obliged with huge boxes of Mother's Day cards as a donation. The warden arranged for each inmate to draw a number, and they lined up through the cell blocks to get their cards. Weeks later, the nun was looking ahead on her calendar, and decided to call Hallmark again and ask for as many Father's Day cards, in order to avoid another rush. As Father's Day approached, the warden announced free cards were again available at the chapel. To the nun's surprise, not a single prisoner ever asked her for a Father's Day card. The father-wound is most often a wound of absence--emotional as well as physical. As such, it's harder to recognize than others.
So what can you do with the hurt or the gnawing on your gut when it seems that everyone is happy about fatherís day?
First, examine what is the root of the issues between you and your father. Is it something trivial or deeply rooted? If itís something that you can fix, I urge you to do it. If it isnít, then talk to your heavenly father about it. Open your wound to Him and let Him be the father you donít have here. Itís sad that we canít make people act right but we can do what we can and just leave it to God.
Psalms 27:10 assures us that ďwhen my father and my mother forsake me, then the Lord will take me up.Ē
This means that the Lord will take up the slack. He will be your father when your earthly father has no clue who you are or how to love you. Obviously itís hard to have a physical touch from the Lord but if we will take time to sit in His presence we can feel Him. His touch of our broken spirit and father-wound will be absorbed by His deep love for us. Nothing can separate us from His love. (Romans 8:38, 39) Celebrate your heavenly fatherís love and honor Him.
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