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Eye of the Storm
by mark walters
04/21/12
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The Eye of the Storm


Around my life, the world explodes
I see my plans and hopes erode
Assumptions break apart as glass
Swirling down into the dark morass

A Specter through the vortex hovers
Darkened clouds pull back the covers
A deadly phantom, now no stranger
Yet where I sit I know no danger

God turns this darkest night to dawn
Though death trumps his mortal pawn
The reaper grins with ghastly glower
But his cursed bell is null of power

Death’s knell last pealed at Calvary
When Christ arose to set us free
From His broken tomb away we fly
Beyond the glint of fading sky

Jesus Who died bids me be wise
So from my ends a victor rise
The stormy eye that threatens me
Shall be slain by faith it cannot see

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Member Comments
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Gerri Wright 21 Apr 2012
You have a very good feel for meter and rhythm. There's some good imagery here, too. I like it. Good work. There were a couple of times (the second stanza and the last) where you changed imagery and then returned to the previous idea/image in the next line. This jarred my focus from what I was reading. I think it might be stronger if you stayed with the same idea through the whole stanza. In stanza 2 you switched from specter to dark clouds pulling back the covers, then back to phantoms. What if instead you described it with a ghostly or skeletal hand pulling back the covers? (Or whatever image you like) And in the last stanza the image shifts from a battle to the stormy eye, which makes me think of a hurricane, then back to slaying the creature. This one especially pulled me out of what you were trying to say, because I was thinking, "You can't kill a hurricane." Just a suggestion. Poetry is very subjective.




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