Where do tears come from? Tear ducts of course, but what generates them to appear upon the surface of our face, running down our cheeks, and dripping off our chin? How much emotion must be stirred to produce these tears, and does this power emanate from the mind, soul, or the heart? What depth of wounding must we endure to start a flow of salty water from our bodies?
In some cases there is no wound or hurt, but rather a joy or a welling up of a happiness or praise for a certain event that we shared with someone else. Sometimes, it will even happen when we are alone, maybe by just one precious memory from our past that will cause either a smile, or draw a tear to our face. I believe that God gave us a very special and precious gift, the gift of memories, which follows closely behind His greatest gift, His Son, Jesus.
No matter what our beliefs, funerals represent death of the body. As believers in Christ, this death of the body means our soul is now at peace in His presence. Either way of belief still will give rise to many flows of tears. Hankies can fill up quickly and consoling loved ones and friends will hover closely to somehow provide any comfort possible. Why does death bring tears to some and not others? Why do some feel such depth of pain to the point of tears, and others do not?
It does not have to involve the death or departing of a body, but instead that of a relationship, whether physical or intellectual. Our thoughts are forced to accept the reality of the situation that this ďentityĒ will no longer be able to share with us any longer the things that brought to each of us great joy and happiness; or brought maybe comfort by the simple act of sharing time and space. But there is also another emotion represented here that is not yet mentioned: love. This emotion has so many different facets and levels which can place us into so many different kinds of relationships, or even friendships.
Love is a very strange force that affects us each, not only at differing facets and levels, but also differing depths and conditions. I spoke to a person once about the loss of several close relatives in his life, two uncles, and both parents in just a few years. His concern was that he loved them all very much, yet he had shed few, if any, tears for them. They were loved and missed, and they invoked grief, and yet, in comparison, he could sit and watch a touching movie or news report, and shed many more tears then for his known loved ones.
I had to tell this person that I had no deep, psychological explanation for his feelings. I listen, and sometimes ask questions, but I donít have very many answers, at least ones that would satisfy everybodyís situation. We each have various boundaries in our lives. Some are allowed to stretch very far from our core, or even our abilities, and yet others have boundaries so close no one else can enter in or breech their inner circle, their comfort zone. Itís not so strange an occurrence when you stop to realize that by allowing someone to enter too close, we are inadvertently giving them the opportunity to hurt us.
But what do I know, Iím just a rambling old man that just comes up with a lot of questions and thoughts and throwing them out to see if anyone understands them better then I do!
Tears are a God- given gift, which washes away our mental and physical pain.'Big boys don't cry' is the biggest myth known to man!
We ALL need to cry, whether through joy or sadness, it is a relief/release.
Thank you, Ken, for this reminder.