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The Home for Christian Writers! Matthew 6:33

Grief

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Fleeting Surrender

by Suellen Fry
01/18/12
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I am consumed with intense emotion screaming for air.
I can't breathe underneath this mire of insanity slithering through my veins.
You won’t leave me; you’re even in my dreams
Is this really happening or I am simply insane?
There’s a rush of coldness
Burning my flesh and hardening my soul
I am tired of seeing your ash colored face and your half moon mouth
A crooked smile
This is getting old

I turn to my angel
Who opens his wings
He warms me for a moment
As he wraps his feathered arms
Around my burned out mind
It’s a fleeting surrender
To my maker I render
All that I have and what has been



The staircase is winding
But it never ends
I am falling in your world of control
The stench is overwhelming
A riveting wind
Encircling my consciousness
Like a smoke filled bar

I am consumed with intense emotion
My body is melting
In this plastic mold
Hardening by the minute
There’s no turning back
I feel lonely and cold

How did I get here
I do recall holding your lifeless hand
Trying to love your blackened spirit
With my bludgeoned heart
It was all so pointless
A soiled love
Stained with the ruins of old bones
that clamor in my closet.


I turn to my angel
Who opens his wings
He warms me for a moment
As he wraps his feathered arms
Around my hunched over back
It’s a fleeting surrender
To my maker I render
All that I have and what has been

I am consumed with emotion
I am trapped in this dream
Can I wake up to the world?
Or am I stuck with what has been?
Do I need to explain?
Should I just stay in bed?
And continue this nightmare
With you in my head

How did I get here?
I do recall holding your lifeless hand
Trying to love your blackened spirit
With my bludgeoned heart
It was all so pointless
A soiled love
Stained with the ruins of old bones
That clamor in my closet.




I turn to my angel
Who opens his wings
He warms me for a moment
As he wraps his feathered arms
Around my aching flesh
It’s a fleeting surrender
To my maker I render
All that I have and what has been





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...in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them... 2 Cor 5:19

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