I've always been unsure on my beliefs to be honest. I would go through phases where I would believe God was there and other times of trouble I wanted nothing to do with God and I thought to myself if God is such a loving God then why am I experiencing such suffering. But never before had I really had a daily relationship like I do today.
It wasn't until last July 2011, when I realised Jesus carries you through hard times and it was my pain and suffering that God used to work for my good and to help me fall in love with Jesus. It started when people I knew were interested in things that I knew were ungodly. From then on I seemed to have this worry and grief which seemed to never leave me. I had gone through life with worries, as we all do, but I knew something was wrong and I remember crying out for God one time when I felt I had done all I could to feel better but nothing had worked. That is when I came to Alison and Rachel at the church, telling them my worries and God has really blessed me with the people in my life. That in itself has really showed me who God is, a God of love. It was a Tuesday night at YPF (youth group), I remember clearly Rachel and Alison sat down and told me about Jesus and his great love, and how he will never leave me in troubled times. I believe the Holy Spirit really touched me, as that evening despite my inner pain I began to laugh which I believe to be from the joy of the spirit. I had heard all this before about Jesus but that day was the first time I really felt the presence of God.
Although it took some time in prayer, bible reading and waiting on God, Jesus completely healed me of this worry and used it to help me grow and mature in faith. One thing I thought as a non-Christian was that reading the bible meant reading long endless rules. Until I became Holy Spirit baptised, and then I felt the bible coming alive more and the things I read and the things God showed me had so much meaning to my life. God showed me how what happened in bible times can happen now in this century. I mean I started to see healings and just God working in the most amazing ways. I saw God really transform my friends, which also encouraged me. Now I Can honestly look back through those trouble times where I felt lost, where I got no sleep, I seemed to be always down, I couldn’t enjoy things, and say that Jesus has got me out of all those. And now I owe my life to him as he gave up his life for me.
One thing I always thought about Christianity was that it was following rules and regulations. Little did I know about a personal relationship with Jesus himself and being baptised in the Holy Spirit, which I had heard from my uncle who has been a huge encouragement to my faith. From this I found a new way of dealing with problems, I had noticed a complete change of my approach to life, then I knew how Jesus completely transforms lives from the saddest of times to a happiness only God gives and freely and out of grace through Jesus.
Jesus has changed my life and has been with me through the tough and the joyful moments of my life. I have learnt now to trust in God, because the journey he takes me on may seem difficult but God always works for Good, so I know where he is leading me.
A relationship with Jesus has changed my life and Jesus' love does not compare with Earthly joy. God has given me such a blessing in all the family I have and the wonderful people, who have helped me along this journey, which I know is only beginning.
I would like to thank the following people, Alison, Josh, Chris, Rachel, my uncle and for my family for all the prayer support and encouragement, you all have been a great blessing to me.
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