Doing much better today – even drove to the mail box (3 miles one way approx). Took a shower with no one standing by and made dinner, baking corn bread etc.
Am taking a leap here (but maybe a logical one as the Lord knows I “do words” and write and play with written communication all the time.) He laid it on my heart that “this is not unto death”. I have been cogitating and came up with “yah, but there is a lot of territory between whole and having breasts left and having a mastectomy”
You seen the pretty bras I ordered in my expected size to encourage me sit on the bed unwrapped because I am not washing them when I might have to send them back. Why would I have to send them back? If the surgery biopsy showed cancer and cancer outside the ducts then I would be a candidate for a mastectomy.
SO today it came to me (did I conger it up or was it the still, small voice? Am I unpackaging those bras and running to the washer? Nope, I am typing an e-mail to you my Teri-sounding board.)
“This is not unto death….” The unsaid part being not even death of a breast….so I am trying to make that flying leap that means I am still going to have both breasts and wear bras and not have a mutilating mastectomy.
I put my hand in Jesus’s hand this AM in the living room and took those two steps – walking after Him wherever He leads.
Don’t I just love waiting? Oh, oh, I think I am flunking Patience 101 – again…..
I “saw” the light coming down from heaven as I praised with uplifted hands into my fingertips and shining, glowing golden light across both breasts. At that time I had no idea that both were having surgery – they did though. I should grasp that “vision” and hang onto it like it is gold because it was and is. HE is able, when I am puny His strength is made perfect.
Would it be a leap of faith to put those bras in the washer or an act of presumption. Well, at least I have put 3 of them in for now….
Published this on my blog and glad there aren't many guys who read but you gals will definitely understand....
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Many have had what you have described, me too. My mastectomy was in 1970 at age 40..I am now 83 (no recurrence...no chemo...no radiation) The most difficult part for me was the first look in the mirror...after that I had to change my choice of blouses, etc. Medical science has come a long way since then and sometimes they do reconstructive replacement. One think I have clung to is; my breast may be gone but my Lord is still here and HE is everything to me. God Bless you and please don't be afraid.
Wash them all! Does God have to use a hammer? :) Believe God, if you were wrong, He'll supply your needs anyway. Now that is easy for me to say because it isn't me, but I do believe we have to cling to our faith,nothing wavering. Sometimes I have to go to the past to recall the special blessed times by our Lord, and that helps me in a present situation. God has already performed the greatest miracle on earth for you. You are His child and He has led you for years. He is not likely to stop now. Loads of love, Verna