Peak weekend in the aspen leaf season, fluttering golden orbs surrounding the two track trail I was walking, liquid gold with sunshine streaming all around me. In the autumn painted landscape of gold, orange, rust, lime green and yellow I saw a snowy dusted Pike’s Peak.
“God, this is so exquisite” escaped from my whispering lips.
The elk were bugling and coyotes yipping and howling almost as if they were giving their favorable critique to the God’s painted scene.
We had a morning teaching and were sent out from the huge log cabin housing the ladies retreat with instructions to take a notebook, pen and Bible asking the Lord to shine a spotlight on us and to listen.
I passed several of the gals who found a stumpy log or rock seat already. My head was overflowing and I needed to sit and write soon. I asked the Lord an old Youth With a Mission prayer question. “Lord, what is my area of greatest need?” And felt that I was getting an amplified answer. I had a brand new breast cancer and diabetes diagnosis and that was my focus. The Lord had an answer for both.
I sat and began to write repeating again the questioning prayer, Lord, what is my area of greatest need?.
Jesus in me LARGER with me decreasing – I agree that things go best when I get out of the way.
Jesus’ purity purging me
Jesus lifting me to Him
Jesus’ hope overcoming
Me overcoming through my Lord
Me surrendering: will, plans, emotions, life, goals- all yielded up to Jesus
The Lord then nudged me to look up John 1:7 and I wasn’t sure if it was John or 1st John 1:7. I looked up John 1:7.
New King James Version (NKJV)
7 This man came for a witness, to bear witness of the Light, that all through him might believe.
And then I looked up the 2nd reference having no idea ahead what was in either of the verses. God is SO good. Both passages tied in and were about the Light of the world, Jesus Christ, his giving us light and instructions on how to walk. Reminding me that I especially need to walk right now, not run.
1 John 1:7
New King James Version (NKJV)
7 But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin.
Then more answer to my prayer came:
Remain malleable in your Master’s hands
Jesus is your craftsman, redeemer, creator God, your completer, your husband, bondsman, “paid in full”.
The scripture chorus then came to me “Thou hast turned my mourning into dancing for me, Thou hast put off my sackcloth, to the end my glory shall sing praise unto Thee and not be sorry. Oh, Lord my God I shall give praise unto Thee forever… I sang.
A poem came to me then.
Child set free
Precious little one
Captivated by Me
Son shining brightly
Warming your heart
Healing within you
Granting fresh start
One step taken
Your hand in Mine
Savior leads onward
Eternity within time
Marijo, I SEE you.
Soak in my Word (Psalm 71)
God the Rock of Salvation
1 In You, O LORD, I put my trust;
Let me never be put to shame.
2 Deliver me in Your righteousness, and cause me to escape;
Incline Your ear to me, and save me.
3 Be my strong refuge,
To which I may resort continually;
You have given the commandment to save me,
For You are my rock and my fortress.
4 Deliver me, O my God, out of the hand of the wicked,
Out of the hand of the unrighteous and cruel man.
5 For You are my hope, O Lord GOD;
You are my trust from my youth.
6 By You I have been upheld from birth;
You are He who took me out of my mother’s womb.
My praise shall be continually of You.
7 I have become as a wonder to many,
But You are my strong refuge.
8 Let my mouth be filled with Your praise
And with Your glory all the day.
9 Do not cast me off in the time of old age;
Do not forsake me when my strength fails.
10 For my enemies speak against me;
And those who lie in wait for my life take counsel together,
11 Saying, “God has forsaken him;
Pursue and take him, for there is none to deliver him.”
12 O God, do not be far from me;
O my God, make haste to help me!
13 Let them be confounded and consumed
Who are adversaries of my life;
Let them be covered with reproach and dishonor
Who seek my hurt.
14 But I will hope continually,
And will praise You yet more and more.
15 My mouth shall tell of Your righteousness
And Your salvation all the day,
For I do not know their limits.
16 I will go in the strength of the Lord GOD;
I will make mention of Your righteousness, of Yours only.
17 O God, You have taught me from my youth;
And to this day I declare Your wondrous works.
18 Now also when I am old and grayheaded,
O God, do not forsake me,
Until I declare Your strength to this generation,
Your power to everyone who is to come.
19 Also Your righteousness, O God, is very high,
You who have done great things;
O God, who is like You?
20 You, who have shown me great and severe troubles,
Shall revive me again,
And bring me up again from the depths of the earth.
21 You shall increase my greatness,
And comfort me on every side.
22 Also with the lute I will praise You—
And Your faithfulness, O my God!
To You I will sing with the harp,
O Holy One of Israel.
23 My lips shall greatly rejoice when I sing to You,
And my soul, which You have redeemed.
24 My tongue also shall talk of Your righteousness all the day long;
For they are confounded,
For they are brought to shame
Who seek my hurt.
“And the Son of righteous shall arise with healing in His wings….” (Malachi 4:2
My presence is HEALING
My presence is LIFE
My presence is freedom
My presence is liberty
My presence is LOVE/AGAPE
I have been going over and over this since the retreat. It is amazing what will happen when we dare to hush up and get quiet before our Lord with notebook and pen in hand.
HE desires to speak to our hearts. HE desired intimate fellowship with us. The creator of the universe wants to sit and speak into our lives. Could anything be more amazing than that?
What do I need for my cancer diagnosis, more of Jesus. The day I got that diagnosis I put it at His feet and placed my hand in His. Each day since, I have done that in my living room after dancing before Him and praising Him name. No, I didn’t do this each day before this. But not I am placing my hand in His, allowing Him to lead me through that day and walking in His footsteps.
HE is able. As I yield daily I put myself into His most capable hands. Do I know the end from the beginning, nope, that’s His territory and I am very glad it is! I do know my Savior and my life is, indeed, in His hands.
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(C) Marijo Phelps all rights reserved. Use with proper credits.
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Marijo, this is a very beautiful and encouraging read. I am sorry to hear about the cancer diagnosis. We know that God has the last word. I was diagnosed with lyme disease and know that God can heal, preserve, strengthen and lengthen our days. It was a very painful journey but I'm alive and well until the Lord sees fit to call me home... Yes & Amen! More of Jesus we need. Thanks for sharing. The Lord bless and keep thee. Hugs