It has been a while since Iíve been in the outer realm of me but as I was lying in the bed this morning I was recaptured by a since of the unknown. I reared back and placed myself in position to focus on what was happening around me. As I did so, I was placed in a park where a man was sitting alone on the bench. He was not having conversation with himself and he didnít look as if he was being bothered by anyone.
As I approached him, I checked out his appearance and from the clothes he was wearing, I believed that he was a homeless man. I could see that he had worn these clothes for more than a day or so. They seemed to be ragged but strangely he had on a brand new pair of gym shoes.
I got closer and as I approached he called out to me, donít be afraid. Iím not who you may think I am. Sit down, he said. Let me give you something you think you know but donít. These words puzzled me but for some weird reason, I sat down next to him and he told me this story.
I was raised by two loving parents. My father was a hard working man and so was my mother. They paid close attention to how I was coming up. What I mean is they made sure that I was being well educated. They stayed on me for learning what was what.
I was about seventeen and both my mother and my father died in a tragic car accident. They left me where the state would take me in because I was too old and I had no other family to care for me. I had to make a sudden decision on my life.
Growing up I used to watch how hard it was for my parents to maintain a plain standard of living. They tried very hard and worked just as hard but they still only just made it. I watched the news and I gathered knowledge from those who surrounded me on how hard it was to survive in this world. I watched Black President Obama being scrutinized by people who wouldnít give him a chance to make things right, even when they knew how intelligent he and his wife Michelle were. All of these things brought up my decision to be what I am today.
You look at me and see what you see but you donít see me. You donít see that I am spiritually happy. You donít see that I have everything needed to bring me to that happy state. I decided that I would not try hard and just make it. I decided that I would not work hard and give my mind, body and soul to those who only want to see my failure. I decided that I would be a free man.
At this point, I had to stop him and ask if he believed in GOD. I wanted to know what it was that led him to this decision and how could he ever say that he was happy being homeless.
He told me, I donít believe in GOD, I know that there is a light that shines on me. I know that it protects me from all that I should have died from and it feeds me when I am hungry. When I need shelter I am housed and I have never gone naked.
Since the age of seventeen I have been on my own. I have grown and have been suited to meet the needs of my growth. I have never gone hungry. I have never worked nor have I lived in an apartment or a house since the death of my parents. You ask me if I believe in GOD no my friend I donít believe, I know that there is a GOD.
When my parents died I was removed from the home that they worked so hard for me to grow up in. I was not given any reason to stay because I had not job to keep it up nor was I able to do the job that two people barely could do. With only the clothes on my back, I was guided into the streets of madness.
At first I only walked aimlessly, searching for what, I donít know. I only knew that I had to find something or a reason for me to keep living. I never wanted to die; I just wanted to know if I could find something that I could hold on to in order for me to survive.
Then as the night came, I was in need for a place to lay my head. A very soft voice led me to a place in an abandoned building. The back door was open and I went in and slept. As I slept this very same voice said that I had nothing to worry about. From then till now, I still listen to this voice. It asked me to call out to you.
I asked him, why you think that I was the source you needed to share this story with. As I turned to him for the answer, I was back in the bed viewing the morning light through my bedroom window.
When I searched for reason, I could only think that something was about to happen and I would not be in control. I know that many times we overlook our reality and focus more on our materialistic values or that which we have come to live with. Even though we never know what our futures are, we still have a desire to hold on to the things we have acquired in life. We come to think that we will always be provided for.
Today many of us have come to face disasters that are way out of our control. These things happen then we are dependent on others who are appointed to take care of us when all hope is gone. But what happens when the appointed are also those who are in need? Where do we turn our hopes too, when there are no shelters to go too? When the food has been exhausted, where do we go to be fed?
We have seen people who have had to depend on instincts that have failed to work upon request. We have seen where people struggle to make ends meet, when there are no ends to any given situation. When survival times are at our feet, will we survive as animals or will we continue to be amongst the human race?
That little soft voice will be there for those who will listen. For others what will be the circumstances of the voices that you come to hear? We want always to maintain a certain quality of civilization but in times where there is nothing left to depend upon, to what do we draw our limitations?
Read more articles by Dwayne Collins or search for articles on the same topic or others.