Either God Hates Divorce or He Loves It, He Cannot Say Two Things
by Lori Van Dien
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Are you one who justifies divorce using the Word of God?
When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out from his house, and she leaves his house and goes and becomes another man’s wife, and if the latter husband turns against her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house... (Deuteronomy 24:1-3)
How do you reconcile Deuteronomy 24:1-3 with Malachi 2 where God Himself says, “I hate divorce.”? And not only does He hate it, but refuses to accept the offering from the man who divorces, even though he covers the altar with weeping and tears.
Is the bill of divorcement greater than the words from God’s own mouth?
Even Jesus said, “For the hardness of your heart MOSES gave the writing of divorcement.” Not God.
God cannot say two things. Either God hates divorce or He loves it. There is no gray area with God. Don’t be deceived.
Jesus was teaching from the law when he said those words. He was teaching grace and truth from the LAW.
The Pharisees who were tempting him, (with the law) received that answer. Are we going to tempt God? Or will we be “the man or woman who put asunder what God has joined together?”
Jesus was teaching about love relationships. He taught forgiving, or you won’t be forgiven. He said to, “love one another, as I have loved you.” Jesus promised never to leave us. We are to be like Jesus. Even brother Peter told the husbands to dwell with the wife, she is the weaker vessel.
Then again, Ephesians 5, love your wives, as you love yourself. Lay down your life for her as Christ did for us. Love as Christ and the Church. It is supposed to be beautiful and it requires work, examining ourselves, not the other. Change comes from within and flows to the rest.
If we were to use Deuteronomy 24, none of us would be married; we all have things that another might not like. As blood washed people, we are righteous in God's eyes. We do well not judging each other, but as Paul said, judge yourself, that you be not judged.
And here's a second offense: covering the altar of the LORD with tears, with weeping, and with crying out, because you don't get what you want from God. Do you know why? Simple. Because God was there as a witness when you spoke your marriage vows to your young bride, and now you've broken those vows, broken the faith-bond with your vowed companion, your covenant wife. God, not you, made marriage. His Spirit inhabits even the smallest details of marriage. And what does he want from marriage? Children of God, that's what. So guard the spirit of marriage within you. Don't cheat on your spouse.
"I hate divorce," says the God of Israel. God-of-the-Angel-Armies says, "I hate the violent dismembering of the 'one flesh' of marriage." So watch yourselves. Don't let your guard down, (Malachi 2:13-16).
And the Pharisees came to him, and asked him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife? tempting him.
And he answered and said unto them, What did Moses command you?
And they said, Moses suffered to write a bill of divorcement, and to put her away.
And Jesus answered and said unto them, For the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept.
But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female.
For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife;
And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh.
What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder.
1 Peter 3:7-9
Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.
Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous:
not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing.
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