Young men, I am sure that all of you reading this desire to become good providers. You want to become successful in life. You also desire to be a good example and role model to others, especially your children. Certainly, you want to have positive relationships, especially with your wife.
I am writing to men here because men do not talk much about these issues, and men don't want to admit that they don't "have it all together."
All of us must identify any negative experiences, relational issues, or teachings that are not bringing positive results in life, and in spiritual and emotional maturity. We must identify specific things like anger, low self-esteem, depression, lack of forgiveness, or the inability to develop and maintain functional and positive relationships. One must explore his past to see if any specific things in his church, school, or family upbringing have negatively impacted the present.
You must learn to identify emotional and relational issues in yourself and others, and then have a knowledge of the tools, resources, and strategies necessaary to deal with them and bring positive resolutions.
Then, there must be a willingness and sense of need in doing whatever is required to take charge of your life, like counseling, reading books, being mentored by an older, mature Christian man, prayer and Bible reading, or seeking forgiveness and restoration.
Failure to do any of the above can hold you back from success in life and from being a good provider, example, and loving husband and father.
In addition, an area of concern is how denominational or church teachings have impacted your life. I am singling this out from everything else because it often is not considered as one of the culprits of lives moving in a negative direction. What were you taught in church about marriage, about healing and forgiveness, about finances, about success, about self-esteem, about God's will, about life purpose and passion? Some of what you were taught may not be correct because much "biblical" teaching is taken out of context or not based upon sound biblical interpretation. You must continually ask yourself the question: "Is what I have been taught bringing positive results in my life and relationships,and is it hindering or causing emotional and spiritual maturity?"
With all of this said, you can now begin to rid yourself of any emotional baggage weighing you down from becoming that leader, that provider, that example, and Godly person you were meant to be. Just one unresolved issue or wrong belief can block your success in life and spiritual maturity. So, if your life is not moving in a positive direction in one or more areas, find out why and go to work on correcting it.
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