Jesus said unto her, Go, call your husband, and come here. The woman answered and said, I have no husband. Jesus said unto her, you have well said, I have no husband. For you have had five husbands; and he whom you now have is not your husband: in that you said truly (John 4:16-18)
Jesus encountered this Samaritan woman at Jacobís well. He was thirsty and he asked her for a drink. Which at first she was reluctant to give due to an on-going segregation between Jews and Samaritans at that time.
The Lord of Lords doesnít give up in His attempt to minister to this woman with a replacement problem. He begins to figuratively explain that Heís The Living Water,-that if anyone who drinks the water He has, they will never thirst again. This woman said, the well is deep and you donít have anything to draw with. By the way, where can I get this water? Jesus said, go call your husband, and come here. The woman said, I do not have a husband.
The confrontation with the Lord
Itís amazing how Jesus confronted this woman, as He supernaturally reveals the personal secret that she had 5 husbands and now the man she has, is not her husband. The secret impacted her heart as she so naturally admitted she did not have a husband. Jesusí revelation of her secret kept her wondering for a moment, as she thought about the man, the guy and the person who sheís presently living and sleeping with, is not her husband.
She should know. She had five husbands, five distinct relationships. Five different men she married and divorced. And the man sheís presently living with, co-habiting with, or shacking up with in an uncommitted relationship, is not her husband. She had gone through five guys who she believed would be the one, the knight in shining armor, the prince with a purpose, the king that could hold her hand and lead her, but they didnít measure up.
Her expectations were disappointed, her dreams were shattered, and her hopes were gone five times. And now this person sheís living with is not her husband. She quickly reflects on her first husband. She remembers that he didnít understand her. He was a poor dresser. He had no style. He was not constructive with his criticism. He wouldnít express his affection toward her in appropriate places where they can reveal an intimate relationship.
She remembered her second husband had mastered the qualities that her first husband did not have, but every time she would disagree with him she would always give in to him even when she did not want too because she was right. She could never discuss money matters with him. She could never discuss her religious beliefs or politics without arguing their points.
She canít forget her third husband who was better than the first two. Yet, she was afraid of him because he had a terrible temper. In any given situation he would curse and swear at him-self then destroy something in the house when he was enraged with anger. She began to be afraid for her life. She never knew him for expressing any kind of humor. She thought that he was just a serious guy- not a dangerous one.
She cannot get over her fourth husband. This man had secret fantasies he went out to fulfill. She thought he was very romantic in bed. However, she never knew he was a real pervert, and his uncontrolled lusts led him to commit numerous adulterous affairs.
She thought about her fifth husband, the man that talked so well about the ideas, plans, dreams, visions and purposes he wanted to fulfill in their relationship. After she married him he became a couch potato.
And now she doesnít have a husband. She got so disappointed, discouraged and dismayed with marriage that she did not want to take another trip to the wedding altar for the sixth time only to experience another let down and divorce. Therefore, the Samaritans response to Jesus was, I have no husband.
She knew she didnít have a potential husband. She knew he didnít measure up to the qualities that she was looking for in a husband. She didnít bother calling him a fiancť. She didnít recognize him as a boyfriend. She didnít mention that he was a good friend. She only knew she was somewhat acquainted with him and considered that this is just another guy to have around for a short time until we split up.
Itís sad that many women today are still experiencing what this Samaritan woman has experienced nearly 2000 years ago. They have the male replacement. A woman who got so accustom to having someone by her side cannot image themselves alone for a long period of time.
The replacement is a must. It doesnít matter whether or not the last relationship broke up a day ago or a week ago. The woman who desperately needs a replacement begins to rummage in other peopleís lives. They begin to search for Tom, Dick, and Harry in a desperate attempt to blanket them-selves from loneliness by clinging to them in hopes of being accepted. Clinging to people is far different from loving them. It is not so much a statement of your love for them as it is a crying out of your need for them. Like lust, it is intensely selfish. It is taking and not giving. Love is giving.
A woman who has a male replacement issue has to break the habit of using other people as a drug to numb the dull pain of an inner void. The more a woman medicates her-self with another man or a microwave relationship, the less chance they have on allowing God to heal them and take them through the biblical art of dating and relating.
The Samaritan woman said, I donít have a husband. I just have this guy hanging around. I need male attention. I need to be accepted. Although he doesnít totally understand my problem or demonstrates his potential as a husband, I want him around and I need him here because he makes me feel good.
Unwanted and unsuccessful women who failed in their relationships are women who experienced massive abuse. Abused women have confused ideas about relationships and may not understand a healthy platonic relationship with the opposite sex.
If only they will realize that not every guy that comes across their path is not looking for a committed relationship, but a sincere friendship. They would save themselves a lot of heartache and pain. They should just give themselves enough time in prayer and development of their relationship to Jesus who will give them living waters of truth about relationships and guide them to the next true relationship.
Go and call your new acquaintance so I may give you guys living water so you may never thirst again.