The Biblical Art of Dating and Relating
I was meditating and reading the bible and God injected the thought of relationships into my mind so my next series will be the topic of relationships. The church really needs to know the concept from God’s point of view and Jesus, Paul and Peter taught it well. We must continue the trend with an updated and practical approach. So get ready parents this one is for you.
The Levels of Relationship
We need to understand that there are different levels of relationships and we must be able to identify them and defined them. Here they are;
1. Level one- Acquaintance
2. Level two- Friend
3. Level three-Boyfriend and Girlfriend
4. Level four- Fiance/ Fiancee
5. Level five- Husband/ Wife
Level One- Acquaintance
1. An Acquaintance- is knowledge of a person less intimate than friendship.
2. Since an acquaintance is knowledge of a person less INTIMATE than friendship. We cannot call someone we just met a friend or a boy or girl-friend. If we desire to know someone a little better and if they desire to know us a little better then we should focus on increasing our knowledge of this person by developing our intimacy with them.
3. Intimacy means that you have a close relationship with another person where you offer and are offered, validation, affirmation, confirmation, understanding and a sense of being valued spiritually, intellectually, emotionally, physically and relationally.
4. However, in a newly acquainted relationship there are at least 7 major areas of intimacy that need development before you are able to classify the person as a bonafide friend.
5. 1. Spiritual intimacy 2. Intellectual intimacy 3. Emotional intimacy 4.Aesthetical intimacy 5. Recreational intimacy 6. Work intimacy 7. Crisis intimacy.
Level Two- Friend
1. A friend- is a person who one knows, likes and trust, one who remains loyal, supports, sympathizes with, believes, protects, sacrifices him or herself and loves.
2. This definition of a friend is far from a relationship with an acquaintance. There are approximately nine qualities that a friend already posses and continuously practice in a life time to be recognized as a friend.
3. 1. Friends get to know each other 2. Friends learn to like each other 3. Friends grow into trusting and believing in each other 4. Friends support each other 5. Friends sympathize with each other 6. Friends protect each other 7. Friends sacrifice themselves for one another 8. Friends remain loyal to each other 9. Friends grow in their love for one another.
Level Three- Boyfriend and Girlfriend
1. The terms boyfriend and girlfriend are not found in scripture. However, the definition of boyfriend and girlfriend is far more meaningful and closer than that of friends.
2. Webster says the term began being used in 1896 and is defined as – a frequent or regular male companion of a girl or woman. A frequent or regular female companion of a boy or man.
3. The American Heritage dictionary says, a boyfriend is a favored male companion or sweet heart. A girlfriend is a favored female companion or sweetheart.
4. 1. Is he/she frequently there? 2. Is he/she regularly doing all that they began doing in the relationship? 3. Is he/she really demonstrating companionship? 4. Does he/she constantly find favor before one another? 5. Is he/she a sweetheart?
Level Four- Fiance/ Fiancee
1. Fiancé is a man engaged to be married.
2. Fiancee is a woman engaged to be married.
3. They developed right through the three levels and they are ready to go to the next level.
Level Five- Husband and Wife
1. Husband is a married man.
2. Wife is a married woman.
3. The principles by which they live by are clearly given in scripture.
When I was growing up no one sat down with me and shared this information with me. I always wanted to know how to date and relate with people not just my girlfriend. So what I did in Part One of this series is create a structure that parallels to scripture on how to develop a relationship with relatives, colleagues, and your significant other that God will bring across your path.
The levels classify two things; 1. It takes some work to get to the marriage level. 2. We have a clear biblical path of principles for all levels to grow into that level we are trying to develop.
In Part 2, I will go deep into the Acquaintance Experience. So read these levels over well and get ready to go deeper.
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