Although I was raised Catholic, I didn’t believe in God or anything remotely supernatural until I was 22. I was more of the rabid atheist type. But my conversion is another story. Suffice to say I wanted proof that God could act in concrete ways in our world; that prayer could result in physical changes in my life. God has given me sign after sign of his existence and power.
Four years after my conversion, my prayers had been consistently answered. I was lying on my bed one Saturday morning, looking up at the ceiling and thinking about my desperate situation. I had fallen in love again. I was sure it was true love. I had received so many signs from God that he was the one. He felt the same way and believed in the signs as well. But how could this be? He was an Indian army officer posted in an African city for a year, I was there working for an environment program for slightly longer. He was scheduled to go back to India in a few months, and where would the relationship go from there? Once there, he would be posted in remote, dangerous parts of the country for years, and contacting each other would be difficult. His family would never agree to our marriage. In a country where the vast majority of marriages are arranged, I was very far from the ideal candidate. Not only was I not from his caste, I wasn’t even from his country, and knew little about it to top it off. It was a lost cause. Logic said that even if his intentions were good, he would probably eventually be forced to forget me and give in to pressure from his family and culture. I had to break it off before I became too involved and spent too much of my life in a fruitless pursuit. It would only hurt me more later on when he would leave me. At the same time, I knew my life would have no meaning without him.
I was pondering all this in my mind that Saturday morning, feeling at times angry at God for having put me in such a situation, and wondering why He would make this relationship so hard, when we seemed to be made for each other. At times I simply wanted to trust in our love and God’s grace, and at times I was trying to steel myself against my feelings and motivate myself to do the responsible thing by breaking it off with him. After what seemed like hours staring at the ceiling, my father knocked at the door. He came in at my invitation, and handed me a couple letters, saying he had had them for months, and had suddenly remembered to give them to me now.
As he left, I opened one up. It was an old Christmas card from my grandmother. The message on it read: “Dear Sophie, I hope God will guide you in your choices. May you allow yourself to be guided by his word. It can be found in the Bible, but many prefer to ignore it, even though it would bring heaven on earth. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, Mamie.”
At a time when I was looking for answers, God seemed to be telling me where to find them. I figured it couldn’t hurt to take a look. It wouldn’t be the first time I had found answers to my prayers in the bible. I opened up my French bible at a random page, half-expecting to find a solution staring right back at me. It was some kind of love poem. Although I was raised catholic, I had barely touched a bible in my life and knew practically nothing of its contents or organization. I sighed, thinking of how silly this was. I looked away, going back to my daydream, turning the pages absent-mindedly. I looked down again, on a random page, and my eyes immediately stopped on the word “Aaron,” as it was my ex-boyfriend’s name, and it had a star in front of it, for some editing reason. I read the whole sentence it was in. “Alkime, the one who came with the King’s army, is a priest of the race of Aaron, and he will not treat us unjustly.” Although at first I had been stopped by Aaron’s name, I saw that “Alkime” sounded a lot like my boyfriend’s name. I knew that “Al” in Arabic was just an article, and that “Kime” was the real name. “Kime” which sounded just like “Kim” (in French), was how everyone said KM’s name. Suddenly the sentence took on a new meaning. “KM, the one who came with the army, is the one after Aaron, and he will not treat me unjustly.”
What a coincidence to find a passage with my current boyfriend’s name saying that he would not treat me unjustly – which is exactly what I had been fearing that whole morning. Not only that, the parts about him coming with the army and following Aaron were also correct. The more I thought about those coincidences, and that my father should suddenly remember to hand over a message telling me to look into the bible, the more I saw how improbable it all was, and how God had found a way to communicate with me. I had not wanted to blindly trust my heart, or my intuition, or what many consider God’s voice. I had needed proof, written black against white. And once again, God had provided it to me.
I told my boyfriend the story later that afternoon. Although he is Hindu, he believed in this miracle, as well as others we have shared. It was the sign I needed to let go of my doubts and fully embrace what I knew all along: that I could trust him, that I could continue with our relationship. Although we grew up with different religions, we both believe in one supreme God, who has been there for us at all times and created us for each other.
A year and a half later, the message behind that bible passage still holds true. Even with a long-distance relationship and both our families giving us very hard times, we still love each other and hold on to the hope we can be together soon. As God reassured me that day, KM has not treated me unjustly.
The whole truth is contained in the whole Bible. So you and your friend should read it all. Pray daily and read your Bible daily. You will get wonderful guidance from God. I always tell single women the secret. Find a godly man! Sounds as if your's will become one with you. May God richly bless you with his miracles!
In Jesus, Bill