Marriage [is] honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge. Hebrew 13:4;
This is the age that evil is gaining more prominence; people, society, culture and civilization are making frantic attempt to rationalize and create excuses for premarital sex, but, it does not matter what people seem to have generally accepted, the position of the Almighty God can never change. Godís stand with respect to sex is very clear and unambiguous; sex is exclusively reserved for married couples, a man and a woman who are legitimately married. There is nothing sinful about sex if it takes place between couples within the confinements of marriage, but according to the scriptures, Godís wrath looms over everyone who engages in sex outside of marriage unless he or she repents immediately and quit.
Premarital sex comes with a number of consequences ranging from physical to emotional and spiritual. The first danger of sex before marriage is that, those who engage in it are breaking Godís law and order for marriage. Godís order for marriage as clearly stated in Genesis 2: 24 involves leaving, cleaving and becoming one flesh. Those who contravened this order according to the accounts of the bible were either burnt alive or stoned to death! In Godís order for marriage, becoming one flesh [sexual intercourse] is to take place only after the marriage union has been properly consummated following a clear cut leaving [separation consequent upon parental consent] and cleaving [as attested to by public declaration of intention of the couples to live together as husband and wife]. Engaging in sex before marriage is tantamount to building on a wrong spiritual foundation and this may have serious negative effects on the marriage. For those who have fallen victim of premarital sex, immediate genuine repentance is required to break the consequence of violating Godís law and repair the faulty foundation.
Another danger of sex before marriage is that it opens an avenue for distrust and suspicion in the marriage union. Apart from the loss of dignity, honour and self respect the couples would have enjoyed with themselves if they had kept their bodies pure, the chance of suspicion in their marriage will be very high. It may be difficult for those who slept with each other during courtship to trust each other when eventually married. Either of them may be faced with questions such as ĎHow am I sure that he/she will be faithful to me if he/she could not discipline himself/herself during courtship?í What is the assurance that he/she is not sleeping with others if he/she agreed to sleep with me?í These and several other suspicious thoughts can be precipitated by sex before marriage, and could result in serious emotional stress, disturbance or damage, especially during times of pressures and misunderstandings.
In some cultures, the excuse of some ladies for engaging in premarital sex may stem from family or parental pressure to get pregnant before getting married for fear of not having a child after marriage. This is unfounded and ridiculous. There should never be any form of experiment before marriage. The truth is that only God knows what lies ahead of each and every one of us. It is foolish for any lady to think she can keep a man or secure her marriage by getting pregnant before marriage. The fact is, if a there is true love, there will never be any need for pregnancy before marriage as a bait to keep the man. If a man asks you to go to bed with him before getting married, it is doubtful whether he really loves you. What he wants is a child and not you!
Your testimony as a child of God is not what you can toy with. You cannot afford to trade off your future and destiny on the altar of premarital sex. The price could be greater than you can afford to pay! Temptations to go into sex may be intense but you are to resist and keep yourself pure until you are legitimately married. There is nothing to be in a hurry for; the man or the woman will soon be yours but until then, you are not permitted to uncover each otherís skirt and pants. The dignity of marriage is when both of you keep yourselves for each other. The scripture says that God will judge all fornicators and whoremongers it does not matter what the world has accepted as norm.