Just A Chat with God
by Kathy Barnes
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Me: “Lord, do you love me?”
GOD: “Yes, I loved you before you were formed in your mother’s womb. Before you knew who I was, I came looking for you, my lost sheep. I loved you enough to leave heaven and died for you a painful and shameful death on the cross. Today, I still love you just as much as then. If you were the only one that needed saving I still would come for you.”
Me: “Lord, how can you love me, when no one else did?”
GOD: “My child, you are special, and made in My image. You have great value to me. You were created so that we could have fellowship together. I love to spend time with you. I know that others have promised to love you and instead brought you pain and abuse, but I am not man. I am Love and Truth. It is who I am. I can do no less. You will always be the love of My life. The depth of my love for you is endless as the vastness of stars in the night sky.”
Me: “Lord, If you knew half of what I’ve done, You couldn’t possibly love me.”
GOD: “I knew everything you would ever do, before you were born. Nothing you have ever done has surprised or shocked Me. Yes, you have done many things that I wished you had not done. They have hurt you, and your relationship with Me, but I still love you. Others have shown you love as long as you earned it, but the love I give is unconditional. There is nothing that you can do, to stop my love for you. My mercy is great and new each morning. ”
Me: “Lord, why is it that I don’t always feel your love?
GOD: “My child, your fears, your doubts, your sins, your busyness sometimes clouds your view so that you cannot see My face. I will stick to you closer than a brother. You may not always be able to see or feel Me, but I am there. Others have promised to love you, but abandoned you instead. I will never leave you alone, for I live inside you once you open the door and ask me inside. When you feel that you cannot see, or hear Me, trust My heart. Learn My character. ”
Me: “Why do good people die and bad people live?”
GOD: “The answer to why you die is sin. Sometime that death is the results of sickness, sometimes it is the actions of man. I know that when and how you die never makes sense to you. Sometimes the good die and the bad live because I am being merciful and giving the lost another chance, hoping they will turn to me and give up their sins and addictions. The saved will have their reward waiting in heaven. Some died to end their suffering. At times one’s death as a martyr, will lead more to Christ than if they had lived out their life. Some that are saved, turn back toward the world and before they lose their soul or cause too many others to fall away; I have to bring them home. Sadly, some will only come to me if they are looking at death. Some, like babies, I have reasons for their deaths, but because I look forward and backward in time and see so much more than your minds can understand I simply can’t explain. You are not capable of grasping it now.”
Me: “Lord, why do bad things happen to me?
GOD: “The short answer is sin. Sometimes you are reaping what you have sown. You over ate, so you gained ten pounds; you spend too much you get in debt; you stole a car you go to jail. Sometimes you are harmed by someone else’s sin. They chose to drive drunk and you are hit and hurt; a family member says something in anger and your feelings are hurt or they hit you. Sometimes it is the results of sin entering the world, for it brought sickness and death with it. The Earth is cursed from the fall. It does not yield forth its bounty and starvation comes. I know that it is easy to blame Me for all the bad things, but it is the devil, who kills and destroys. I will always find a way to bring some good from any circumstance.
Sometimes, bad things happen to believers because you have forgotten who you are. You live in this world, but are not of this world. Because of that, Satan hates you and tries to destroy you every way he can. You are caught up in the world at times and forget to dress for battle and cover you day with prayer. You stop abiding in me, and remove your protection. At times you even speak curses over yourself: ‘I will never be able to …, I can’t win over …”
Me: “Lord, why is it that my prayers go unanswered and unheard? Why are you always late?”
GOD: “I always hear, but if you ask with sin in your heart, your prayers have no effect. I will answer none of your prayers before you ask me to be Lord. Fortunately, for you, others pray for you. Sometime your prayers are blocked because you refused to forgive someone.”
“Prayers are answered; yes, no, and wait. You forget or fail to recognize the yes’ that are answered quickly or before you even ask. You foolishly rail at the no’s. Sometimes what you ask is not in your best interest. ‘Just let me die,’ or ‘I wish I never had to see so-in-so again.’ You would regret it later, if I answered yes.
However, ‘wait’ seems to be the one that causes the most distress. I know best and I will not give you something that would hurt you. A loving father does not give a child a loaded gun, before he knows how to use it and what destruction it can cause. The fast car in the hands of a teen could lead to death. If you cannot manage yourself and your household, then you cannot manage a fortune 500 company. I must sometimes wait for you to grow before you can have what you ask.”
Me: “Lord, You can’t ask me to forgive them. You don’t know what they have done. They have lied, stabbed me in the back, cost me a job, or broke my heart. They have abused, beat, raped, cheated, murdered me or someone I love. You can’t expect me to forgive them, can You?”
GOD: “Yes, I can. I was slandered, beaten, abused, abandoned, tortured, and murdered but I forgave man. If I can forgive your sins, then you can do the same for someone else.
I also ask for a second reason. I need you to give me Your hurt and pain so that you can be free from it. You forgive others not because they deserve it, but to free yourself from their chains. As long as you hold on to hate and bitterness, it eats you alive and keeps you as its prisoner. For My sake pray that they too may be saved, and know My mercy.”
Me: “Lord, why must I go through trials?”
GOD: “I know you don’t like them, but they build character and strength. They help you see your heart and what you truly believe and how much you have grown. They force you to face your beliefs, and determine if you are looking to God, or man, for answers. Too often you are looking at circumstances, or things, to make you happy, when I could give you peace and joy. You get comfortable and don’t want to change, but trials encourage you step out and walk on water. If you exercise your faith, you will find that I will show up and not let you drown. Because of what you have endured, you can have compassion on another and help them through their trials.”
Me: “What is heaven like?”
GOD: “First let me say what it is not. It is not sitting endlessly on white clouds playing the same song on a harp over and over. You are not trapped in a boring service watching a clock for an ending time that never comes.
Heaven is a place of great beauty. The street are gold, the walls are beautiful colored stones and pearls. It is always light and happy. Heaven is full of angels and people worshiping and having fun. Man’s traditions make worshiping old and dead but in Heaven, we will be singing and dancing in the street unable to contain our joy.
You may simply want to set in awe at Jesus feet and be grateful for all the prayer that we now know and see that He has answered. The deep pool of love in His eyes may hold us in awe. You may fall speechless before God as we share His mind and understand the wisdom that created the universe. A million thanks may be uttered as we look at those nail scared hands. The sound of Jesus voice may cause us to stop and listen.
There will be the wedding table and people gathered round laughing eating and enjoying life. Family and old friends will be reunited and catching up on all they missed. I can hear the stories you will tell:
Did I ever tell you about the time I was coming home from school in a little green pinto and rounded the corner to see two eighteen wheelers staring right at me? There was no shoulder, all I had time to say was “Jesus,” and an angel opened up a hole and I went right through it, safe. Is not God’s mercy great?
‘Son, come here.’ The doctors said I could never have a kid, but look at him. Let me tell you about all the things he done. Oh, and God blessed me with a daughter too. Isn’t His love wonderful?
We will wander away to find Grandpa or an old friend leaning again a stump with a fishing pole in their hand. As we set down next to them, we will laugh about the old times and the love we had to share because we knew God.
We will open the door to our mansion to find someone we never met, but know, standing there holding out a gift. I like working with my hands here’s a vase, or a cake, or a painting I made for you. I wanted to say thank you for showing me His love. Without the money you gave for missions I would not have had water to drink or heard about His love. I just want to come in and tell you about how good He has been to me.
Hey, come with me to sing in the heavenly choir. It is music to make you soar and better yet, I can actually sing perfectly. I am not tone deaf anymore.
Abraham and Moses are over by the wall. I have always wanted to speak with them; we could go there if you rather. They are telling all the things God got them through.
The best thing is you have time to do them all.”
Me: “What is Hell like?”
GOD: “Hell is a dark place of great torment and suffering. It was created for Satan and his followers, but was expanded to also hold unrepentant man. It is a place of much regret and despair, for they will know the pain and hurt they have caused others and it will be constantly before their eyes. They will hear every mean word they have said repeated. They will see the goodness of God and they will know that they chose to throw it away. ‘Why did I make this choice?” will never leave their mind.
The body will be forever burning with torturous pain and agony, which never ends. The nerves will throb with pain each moment worse than the last. The sulfurous stink of burning flesh will take your breathe away, and your throat will cough and cry out for a drop of water to sooth it from it anguish. Screams will fill the ears of those caught there, both their own and others. Eyes will be useless in the darkness. There will be great loneliness, no partying with fellow prisoners. They will cry out for mercy, but it will be too late and there will be none. Pleas for nonexistence and peace never stop, but are never answered, yes.”
Me: “How could a good God let anyone go to Hell?”
GOD: “I have no desire that any die and go to hell, but I have given man the right to choose. I am not a mean monster looking for a reason to punish and kill you. You have already given it to me, that is why I died so that you could have life. There comes a time when good and evil must be judged. Justice is not fair if there is never a price to pay for any action. I am a holy God and I cannot look on evil in any form. I must hold you accountable for every word and every action that you have taken to harm another, yourself, or against Me. The cost of sin is death. The only reprieve from the death sentence is to plea the blood of Christ.
I did not make you robots, but I have given man free will. Even when most times, his choices are not my desires I must allow him to make them. Through My death, I made a bridge back to God and redeemed you. It would have been easier for me and cost me less, if I had left you in your sin, but I loved you too much to do for that. The gift is there, but man must choose to open it. I am a gentleman, I will not force your heart to conform to Mine.”
Me: “But all roads lead to God, don’t they?”
GOD: “No, that is a lie of Satan. I am the way, the truth, no one comes to the Father but by me. The path to destruction is wide but the gate is narrow that lead to salvation. The God that created you, and He is the only one with the power and authority to say how salvation will be done. He declares through His word, the Bible, that His one and only son, Jesus Christ is the only acceptable way to Him. God will one day judge the world and I am telling you the only answer to the charges is to plead the blood.”
Me: “But are not Buddha, Allah, Confucius, and others religions just as good.”
GOD: “No, again only God has the right to say the way. They did not do what I, Jesus, did. None of them have empty graves. They ask that you die for them. I died for you. They ask that you earn their love, I offered Mine freely.”
Me: “But I am not a murder and crook, I do good, surely it is enough?”
GOD: “No, that too is a lie of Satan. He wants you to look and compare yourself to other men. There will always be someone worse than you. He wants you to think that you can earn your salvation by good works. He wants you to think you can be equal too God and do it your way. That is what got him kicked out of Heaven, for he too was a created being who tried to be above God.
No matter how good you are compared to God you are but filthy rags. You don’t begin to come close. All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. The Father is holy and cannot abide with any evil.
God gave the law so that you could look at it and know what He expects and they you missed the mark. Remember if you even think about breaking it or break even one part of it then it is punishable by death. You cannot go back in time and undo that which was done and no amount of good deeds can change it. Unlike false gods, I do not require you to try to do the impossible. I paid the price, by living a perfect life, and dying to cover your sin. When you accept my gift, my blood washes your sins away making you new and white as snow. I place on you my robes of righteousness so that when God looks at you, He sees me. You are holy because I am holy. I intercede for you with my Father offering up My prayers for your benefit.”
Me: “But I go to church, and sing in the choir that has to count, right?”
GOD: “Just because your name is on the church roll, or you did things using my name does not get you into heaven. Many will call me Lord, but I will say depart from me for you know me not. It is not enough to know about me, the devil knows about me, but he does not call me his Lord. You must have a relationship with me. It is not head knowledge that saves, but your heart. You must earnestly desire to turn away from sin and surrender your heart to my will and humbly ask me in.”
Me: “But it cost too much. I would have to give up everything I love.”
GOD: “Yes, I know it cost. I left heaven glory to be a baby born of a virgin. I was persecuted, tortured, shamed, abandon and killed for you. I give salvation to you freely, but I paid the cost.
There is a way that seems right to man but leads to death. The things that you would have to give up to follow me, may not look it but would cause you death. Drugs, alcohols, greed, lust, and pride give pleasures for a moment, but in the end take all. You do not lose because you surrender to me, but gain. For I will give you so much more than they and it will not cause you harm.
Give me your pain, and hurts and I will give you healing. Give me your broken dreams and I will give you hope. Give me your sorrows and I will give you joy. Give me you fear and worry and I will give you peace. Give me your defeats and I will give you victory. Give me your death and I will give you life.”
Me: “Do I have to do it now, why can’t I wait till later after I have had my fun?”
GOD: “First, because you are not promised a tomorrow. Today could be your last. Few have the luxury of knowing the hour of their death.
Second, I stand at the door and knock. But I will not always do so. If you harden your heart enough to my call, I will eventually stop. You cannot demand that it be done on your timeline. The price is high if you miss that last call. Is it worth the risk? No one can pray you into heaven after your dead. The choice is yours while you live. If you choose not to answer, you have made a choice.
Last, if you accept me and are saved at the last minute what will you feel when others ask who you brought with you and you have to answer no one. I was too selfish to care about anyone else. What will you say to the one that goes to Hell because you did not speak to him?”
Me: “How do I know if I am saved?”
GOD: “If you have to ask you are not. If I asked if you graduated high school, you would say yes or no. You may not remember the day of week or date but you would know you did. If I asked you to describe your grandfather, you would say he was short, tall, fat, skinny, funny, or mean or that you never meet him. If there has never been a change in your life and you do not know my voice and heart, you have not been saved. I promise that if I live inside you, you will know it without doubt.”
Me: “What do I have to do to be saved?”
GOD: “‘If you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you shall be saved; for with the heart man believes, resulting in righteousness, and with the mouth he confesses, resulting in salvation.’
It does not have to take place in church, it can just as easily be kneeling beside a bed. There can be many there or only you and Me. You do not have to clean yourself up first, you can’t. There are no magic words just a true heart and desire. All you have to do is ask. I take no pleasure in anyone going to Hell.”
Me: “What next?”
GOD: “‘If you confess me before men, I will confess you before my Father.’ You should tell someone about your decision and be baptized. Do not listen to Satan’s lies. No one will laugh at you, but the angels in heaven will rejoice with you and your fellow believer will welcome you. I will give you my spirit to live inside you and gifts to help you live in victory.
The church does not matter as long as they preach the Word and Truth. But you need to pick one and go in order to mature. Look for one that has my spirit and is growing. Heaven has only believers in Jesus Christ; there will be no Jews, or gentiles: Baptists, Catholics, Methodists, Pentecostals ect. They will be united again as you were always meant to be.”
Me: “Then what?”
GOD: “ Spend time reading and listening to my word. Learn to hear my voice. Pray every time you are tempted to worry or are afraid. You are a new creature and your desire and wants will begin to change. I don’t expect you to stop every bad habit you have over night. You can’t without my power, but if there is never any change in your life, then you do not know me. I will tell you where to start and give you the power you need to get the job done. Learn what gifts I have given you and how to use them. I give to each according to their need for you are each different and each will be used differently by Me.”
Me: “Lord, what if I mess up again after I am saved?”
GOD: “You are a child of Adam, you will sin again even after you have been saved. It is your old nature, but your new nature should not desire it, If you stay in My power, you will not be defeated. I will still hear your prayer for forgiveness, wash you white as snow, and remove your sin as far away from you as the east is from the west if you repent. However, keep in mind that just because you repent, it does not mean you will not reap the consequences of your actions.
Forgiveness does not give you a license to go out every night partying, getting drunk, or high, cheat on your spouse, lose your temper ect. then showing up Sunday free and clear just because you say, “forgive me.” Repent means to turn away from the sin and go back to the right direction. You must be sadden over your sin and truly desire to stop, and go back to doing right.
If you are truly sorry, but keep repeating the same sin then you have a stronghold. When you have not control your temper or your diet for twenty years or have an addiction, then you get into the habit of sinning and given Satan a strong place to stand. You need to first renounce his hold on your life and claim the blood you are now covered with. Next find Godly men and have them anoint and pray with you: that every stronghold and every fortress of the enemy will be torn down, every speculation and lofty thing raise up again God be taken down, and every thought will be taken captive to the obedience of Christ. Pray for the Holy Spirit to strength you and stay in His Word. You need to speak aloud scriptures that related to your problems or situation been fixed. Example: ‘By His strips we are healed; who the Son set free is free indeed.’ Keep repeating the process until you have victory. Remember that as long as you are breathing the Holy Spirit is still working on you and perfecting you. Do not beat up on yourself or believe Satan’s lies that you will always be defeated.”
Me: “Can I lose my salvation?”
GOD: “ You cannot lose your salvation because you did nothing to earn it. Your salvation depend on me, and I am the same yesterday, today and forever. When I died for your sin I died for all of them, the ones that you have done, are doing, and will do in the future.
When you are saved you name is written in the book of life and upon my hand. I am great than he that is in the world. Death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor thing present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate you for the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus. The only unforgiveable sin is not excepting Me.
Note I don’t sell fire insurance. Walking down an aisle and saying my name is not the same as know me. You can’t buy salvation. Make sure you actually have salvation to lose. Many times when people looked backslidden they have never been truly saved.”
Me: “Lord, what is my purpose in life?”
GOD: “First, you were created to spend time me in fellowship. We should be best friends and know each other’s hearts.
Second, you were designed to reflect my glory to others. Your life should be lived in such away as to make others see me in you. I have given you love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control let them be a light unto the world. Share what you have found with others. Obey My Word, walk, and live as I have lived. You are the only Bible some people will every read.”
Me: “But Lord, I want so much more?”
GOD: “My love, come to Me and learn My heart. Never will I hurt you, tempt you to do evil, or leave you. I will share with you My secrets, give you dreams and visions. Let me set your spirit free from the care and trials of life. I have so many gifts I desire to give you. I want to fill you with wisdom, joy, hope, and peace. Ask of Me and I will gladly open heaven’s doors, and pour out blessing and favor upon you, my bride. If you will but learn to abide in me, I will release my power in your life. It is my desire that you walk in authority and victory. You are the love of my life and no good thing will I withhold from you.
More than anything else though I desire intimacy with you, our hearts and minds becoming one. I want you to long for my presence just as much as I desire to be with you. I love you more than you will ever know.”
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