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Dessert Hair
by Linda Germain 
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The results of a recent study answered an important question asked by women everywhere: which aroma is most pleasing to men?

You may think it has something to do with an alluring musky fragrance that promises romance; or a French sounding bubble bath to leave him weak in the knees with some kind of song on his mind. Not!

The smell that won over all the others was pumpkin pie.

They had to do a study for this? We may reek of lavender or something expensive #5, but what really gets him moving is the delicious aroma of fried chicken, pot roast, biscuits, chocolate cake, barbeque sauce, or apple pie; the list is endless. Personally, I seem to have more leverage with my son if there is a hint of freshly baked cookies wafting in his direction.

A bottle of pumpkin pie shampoo recently came into my possession (no kidding). This spicy hair washing experience permeated the shower like Thanksgiving morning at Grandma’s. I expected strange men to stop, sniff the air, and with a puzzled look, become helpless in the wake of my yummy tresses.

The only male in this house is a huge white feline. The sleepy creature barely deigned to open one eye in appreciation of my delicious eau du pie hair. Perhaps only human type guys are affected by the pungency of a big orange gourd. Tuna conditioner might have been more up that cat's alley.

The inhalation theory did spark my imagination though.

Wouldn’t it be handy if character traits were aromatic? Just by breathing deeply, we could sense honesty, integrity, dependability, and kindness. Much time and pain would be saved if a true heart, a Godly spirit, or a real friend could be sniffed out. This olfactory discernment would be a priceless tool to stem the stench of evil intentions, deception, or bad temper.

Whimsy aside, there is a standard by which to measure what we hope is treasure. The formula: trust in Holy Scripture and prayer to avoid making an alliance with a stinker.

A candy-coated façade can throw us off track and affect our discriminating taste. Life changing decisions depend on more than response to warm fuzzies.

Meanwhile, back to my goldie-locks. The rest of shampoo-boo-boo was not wasted. It was used on a girl whose strawberry blond hair needed some serious aromatic adjustment.

Her scent radar can nail the mailman before he turns the corner. It is her job to announce dangerous incoming junk addressed to my under cover name: Occupant.

She is a dear Golden Retriever named Lucy, who generally smells like a dirty dog. She may not appreciate how the atmosphere around her personal space has changed; but at least she looks better.

I have sworn off samples of anything to do with pumpkins; unless they have four wheels, are pulled by white horses and have an extra pair of glass slippers on board. As for the handsome prince - the wind must have shifted. There seems to be something funny in the air.

Now, where did I put that Salsa Cologne?


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Member Comments
Member Date
Katherine Mikshenas 20 Apr 2006
I really enjoyed this piece. It was light reading and carried a strong message. It really touched me and helped me examine my soul. Excellent job! Thank you for commenting on my piece, A Precious Jewel.
Verna Hardy Dean 13 Feb 2006
Verna Hardy Dean 13 Feb 2006
Joanne Malley 13 Feb 2006
This is my kind of story! I loved every word! Love, Jo
John Hunt 13 Feb 2006
Linda, I remember reading this a while back and was so pleased to see it in the Spotlight. Humorous, thought-provoking, and well-written. Nicely done!
Kay Brown 17 Jul 2004
Now this is a hoot. I misread the title and my real thought on the piece (besides the obvious delight) was, "That is a great essay, but what does it have to do with the desert?" :) Kay
Ginnylynn Rodriguez 16 Jun 2004
Loved it! I'm so thankful God created our sense of smell. Isn't it marvelous that those individuals who spend many hours with the Lord have such a clean fragrance??
Robert Drury 09 Jun 2004
Linda, I loved "Desert Hair." Your nestling the biblical principle of using scripture as a barometer for character judgment in gentle wit and clever humor was brilliant. You have a marvelous and delightful gift! Keep writing! All His Blessings, Mr. Bob AKA: Desperado
Deborah Porter  02 Jun 2004
Linda, you are WONDERFUL! I'm so glad you read my story and left that comment. Otherwise I may not have found you and I enjoyed this so much. But you honest to goodness had a bottle of pumpkin pie shampoo? Ewwww blech! Just goes to show - different tastes (or smells, as the case may be). Now if it was chocolate ... well that would be a different matter altogether. You're a delight Linda, but I am actually feeling a little hungry now! With love, Deb
Mamie Zook 23 Mar 2004
You do have a way with words. I smiled all the way through the article. I especially like the part about being able to breathe evil intentions, deception and bad tempers. If I could do that then I would have saved myself a lot of heartache but unfortunately I had to learn the hard way as most of us do. Thank you for your humor. I needed that very much. Your sister in Christ, Mamie
13 Mar 2004
Very well written and quite amusing.


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