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Fully Present
by Cindee Snider Re
05/07/10
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Early Saturday afternoon as I sat in the hospital cafeteria with a friend, she offered her help in myriad ways - meals, kids (girls, boys, overnight, just days, her house, my house), etc., etc., and while I truly appreciated her offers, I was overwhelmed by the prospect of not only coordinating, but effectively communicating medication schedules and special diets for some of my kids. I understood her desire to help, to do something more than pray, something physical, tangible, practical, yet all I could manage was, ďI honestly donít know, but Iíll think about it - really! - and let you know.Ē She paused and quietly replied, ďYouíre a very hard woman to come alongside in a crisis.Ē

My friend is right. She wasnít judging me or being harsh. Sheíd thoughtfully offered the help she knew I needed, but I was holding her at armís length doing the only thing I know to do when things get rough - keep moving forward one step at a time doing what needs to be done.

Throughout the afternoon, my friendís words hovered at the edges of my thoughts, and slowly, bit by bit revealed a surprising truth. When crisis hits, my perspective instantly shifts and all that exists is the present moment. I am simply, completely, fully immersed in the moment. Wow! What a revelation! As I allowed that thought to sink deeply into my soul, I began to understand what an unexpectedly precious gift comes wrapped in crisis packaging. God was graciously offering me unhurried, distraction-free, intimately focused time with the man I love most in this world, not in a way Iíd have chosen, but in a way I couldnít diminish. Hour after hour, day after day as I sat beside my husband in the hospital, I was simply there. My mind wasnít processing a dozen extraneous details. I wasnít distracted by laundry or email or papers that needed to be graded. I wasnít answering the phone or cutting up vegetables. I was simply there aware of the gentle, rhythmic pumping of the IV, the muffled voices of the nursing staff just beyond the door, the steady ticking of the clock, my husbandís breathing, the quiet rustling of his sheets. I was fully engaged in the moment.

And thatís when it hit me. Isnít that how weíre supposed to live - fully engaged - not just in crisis, but in every moment of every day of our lives? So fully present that we donít miss a thing, not a single blessing? Why do we allow ourselves to become so distracted and scattered, so over-committed and busy and stressed that we take all weíve been given for granted? That we fail to understand all weíve got till itís gone?

Oh Father, teach me to live fully engaged, intently present in each moment of my life. Remind me to breathe so deeply of You that I am forever changed, daily infused with Your passion and power and love, able to embrace the surprising and unexpectedly beautiful lessons and blessings hidden in crisis. Amen.


If you died today, are you absolutely certain that you would go to heaven? You can be! TRUST JESUS NOW

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