Arise My Banner
by Kathy Barnes
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Early in the morning, I do rise and seek thy face;
For sleep fails me, and I toss and turn in my bed.
The stars still shine their light
But I do not find my answers.
I find no way of escape from my torment.
Tears flow from my eyes
Like the mighty river Nile
Until I have no more left to cry.
I call to You for relief,
With sighs and moaning of man and angels
Until my voice has left me.
My throat is dry and parched.
My heart is deep in anguish
Because I have no response from You,
And it can find no comfort or contentment.
I long for You to console me;
Dry my tears and put joy into my heart again.
I am weary of begging for mercy.
My strength fails me because of my iniquity,
And my body wastes away
Until I came to my senses and ask forgiveness
For doubting Your goodness and plan.
Come quickly Jehovah Nissi.
Look upon my enemies for they are many,
And they hate me with a violent hatred
That I do not deserve or merit.
My enemies conspired together
Digging a mighty trench for me to fall into.
They tell lies and scheme about me.
No one stood and said, “This is dishonest.”
They judge and condemn me without a trial.
I give them unto Your hands to judge.
I choose to forgive them and surrender my rights to You.
They accuse me of wrongs and faults
That I have not committed
And deprived me of my lively-hood.
None is left that believe in my value.
Every door that I try is closed
Because of their slanderous accusations.
Be not far from me, for trouble is near.
There is none that can help, but You.
I wait for You; do not let me be ashamed.
Send Your angels to camp around me, in my defense.
The wicked rejoice in their successful plots.
I have become a laughing stock in the town.
I am a reproach to neighbors and acquaintance.
Even my family believes that I am useless
And takes pleasure in my heartaches.
Only a few friends dare to come near
Lest my shame and curses fall on them also
And in their heart they wonder
What secret sin I am committing,
That my prayers continue to go unanswered
And my blessings are being withheld.
Yet, still I will praise and worship You
For You are holy, just and perfect.
And even out of the ashes You will bring joy.
What they meant for evil You will turn for good.
The sun comes up, but brings no joy for me.
I have neither rest, nor peace in its glad song.
Sorrows fill my day and quench my soul.
My distress is ever before me, pulling me down.
Grief fills my soul, because of my adversaries.
Vindicate me, oh Lord, for in You alone; I have trusted.
And I am innocent before You.
Deliver me from those who persecute me.
Do not let my enemies prevail against me,
And be exalted over me in victory.
Arise and put Your shield before me,
And make a way for my escape.
Do not hide Your face from me,
For You are still the rock in whom I take refuge.
Remember that I am Abraham’s offspring
And a child of the Most High God.
Look upon my affliction and my trouble,
And forgive all my sin.
Hear, O Lord, the cry of my heart;
And do not turn away thy servant in anger
But be gracious to me and answer me.
Do not despise and reject me,
Because I am poor and brokenhearted.
Make haste to help me, Oh God of Israel.
Restore to me all that the enemy has stolen.
Open heaven doors and pour out Your blessings.
Let me once again find work for my hands.
You alone, can provide the means for wealth,
And I have many bills to pay.
It is my desire to be able to bless others
Who are also in need and to be a burden to no one.
My debts are mostly my sins, but I am trying to repay.
My failure to be able to do so brings You no glory.
There is no honor in not working; it is against Your will.
I will serve where You put me,
But please, answer me quickly and wait no longer,
For I have fallen and I cannot get up on my own.
Pour out Your love once again on me.
I still need You, with ever breathe that I take;
My Lord, My King, and My Savior.
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