It's simple when I'm with you
by angelos2 wark
Not For Sale
Author requests article critique
Not For Sale
Author requests article critique
“It’s simple when I’m with you.’’
“It’s simple--You’ve got to get this!” Does he have any idea how those seven simple words sliced my heart like a filleted fish? (I guess that was a stupid thought). Of course he does. The sky was never so blue, the grass long and silky as we lay there just enjoying the beauty above and below. He sat up, slapped me on the knee and said, “ Come on, I’ll race you!” Like the wind he was soon invisible. I jumped to my feet chasing after this simply-complex individual. The chase ended as he was running into the lake laughing like an eight-year-old at his favorite fishin’ hole! As I approached the water’s edge, a barrage of lake trout attacked my chest. Yes, he was scooping up fish with his bare hands laughing and tossing them at me as though I were his own human net!
He was doing most of the talkin'--I listened. The fire's flames were mesmerizing as we feasted on fresh lake trout and dreamed of what was yet to come. Again they pierced my inner being, why were his words so tough to chew? If only they swallowed as easily as this fish. “You really do need to get this,” he repeated for the third time that day. “It’s simple when I’m with you.” This was his closing statement before turning in for the night (Thanks a lot). I know He’s right, when has he ever been wrong? My eyes tried desperately to force my mind on things above. I’ve rarely seen so many stars. It’s like the Master Jeweler had sprinkled the night sky with a million diamonds! Sleep came slowly--at least for one of us.
My eyes and ears opened simultaneously as the birds serenaded the new day and the sun peeked its nose above the tree line. He was already up and ready to travel. “Ready for an adventure,” he said, as he offered his right hand pulling me to my feet. A little left over fish would have to do for breakfast, only he knew where our path would lead. Beads of sweat slid down my brow temporarily blurring my vision. Aside from the scorching sun, it was a beautiful day.
As we rounded a curve in the road, I stopped to remove a pebble from my shoe. That’s when he spotted her. As she came closer I could see the pain in her eyes, the lines and creases her face had known for decades were many. I stood to my feet as He gently cupped the old woman’s face in his hands, that’s when I noticed how distorted her right leg was. Her foot twisted, calloused and shoeless. He spoke two simple words. “Be whole.”
The cracking of bones is what caused me to look from her tear streaked face to a twisted mess of wrinkled skin and bones. A tattered old limb was miraculously restored to its former youthful state. The old woman fell to her knees--embraced his ankles, kissing his feet. He gently raised her up, taking this weary old soul into his arms and held her, whispering something into her ear, then she hurried away laughing, crying, only this time with tears of joy! My eyes flooded with tears of my own as once again His words penetrated my soul. “You see, it’s simple when I’m with you.” We walked in silence for what seemed like hours and then chose a large shade tree by the roads edge to rest our feet.
“Come we must continue, the sun will soon be setting,” he said, as we once again took to the dusty old road. My nostrils flexed at the smell of rotten flesh. “There must be a dead animal just ahead of us,” I said, covering my nose and mouth with my left hand. Perhaps twenty yards away what I thought to be a dead animal sickened me even more so.
What appeared to be an old Beggar was but a young leper! The stench of rotting flesh was almost unbearable. His face was covered with holes, one dark cavity where an eye once dwelt, oozed with body fluids. Shame gripped my heart as I found myself keeping my distance. Thinking that He would surely perform a miracle for this poor wretch--I waited. His eyes met mine, like orbs of liquid love burning right through my soul, He motioned for me to come closer. Surely, he wasn’t expecting me to touch this man!
Those eyes though silent, spoke to my heart in that moment and His words came alive inside of me. Slowly I stepped closer. Fear was viciously knocking on my hearts door. I would not--I could not--give in to its lure! I placed my hands on his face. He was trembling, or was that me, I wasn’t sure. The puss from his open sores squeezed between my fingers. Closing my eyes I prayed that I wouldn’t be sick from the smell. The only words I could manage to climb over the lump in my throat were but two. “Be--Whole.”
Suddenly, my chest felt as though a vice was putting the squeeze on me.
He was lifting me off of the ground. Joy flooded my entire being as TWO sparkling green eyes smothered me with love. “No!” I said, “It’s Him not me.” He looked to my companion and understood. As the renewed young man embraced his Master, once again I witnessed him whisper into an ear as another soul made whole, went away leaping and rejoicing!
I wept as He now held me in His arms and whispered into my ear. “It’s simple when I’m with you and I’m with you always.”
The neighbor’s barking dog woke me from my sleep. Wow! That was a dream? It seemed so real. I lay there for a few minutes, just trying to absorb all of what I had experienced in another realm. I thanked the Lord for blessing me with such a vivid reality of how simple Faith can be, when He is with me and He really is with me always! Many times since, He has had to remind me that I am never alone. Jesus is a Friend who stays closer than a brother. (Prov.18: 24b KJV.)
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This is an incredible story and a great message. I almost think I like it better when I thought you were actually in Jesus' time than a dream, but both ways work and your (and Jesus') beautiful message comes through loud and clear! There's a few spots, where you need some editing on your punctuation. One that sticks out is fires flame should be fire's flame. But the ones that I noticed were just little things that can be fixed easily. The story had me sitting on the edge of my chair the whole time. I found myself wondering who he was early on, but as soon as you came across the crippled lady I knew. You may want to let the readers know just a little bit sooner than you did. As soon as I realized who was taking this journey with the MC I was riveted. I'd hate to see you lose a reader because you keep the mystery going a tad too long. Either way it was delightful and you have a great deal of talent. I could see a whole novel about Jesus and his life written this way.