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Hom' on the Range
by Julie Michaelson
02/10/10
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If a man
lies
with another
male
as he
lies
with a woman,
both of
them have
committed
an abomination.
[Leviticus 20:13]
***********************
"I started the other
Bible study,
Lord."

[NOD.]
[WATCHING THE SNOW
FALL OVER PHILADELPHIA.]

"It's BETTER;
that Beth Moore one
was drivin' me NUTS."

[CHUCKLE.]
[GAZE AT TWO
PEOPLE SHOVELING
A WALK, OUTSIDE
THE CITY OF BROTHERLY
LOVE.]

"I still don't GET it;
EVERY class.....
SOMEBODY has
to bring up.....how bad,
HOMOSEXUALITY is...?"
(Squint up at the hall light.)
"It's so STUPID!"

[FROWN.]
[SNOWY RUMBLE.]

"What about all
that ANIMAL CRUELTY,
in the BIBLE? Ya never
said anything, about THAT!"

[FROWN.]
[COLD, WINDY RUMBLE OVER SOUTH TEXAS.]

"WELL?
It was OKAY to slaughter....
thousands, and THOUSANDS,
AND THOUSANDS...
of those innocent
SHEEP, and COWS,
and....PIGEONS?
What about THAT?"

[SHORT RUMBLE.]
"Who AM I,
child?"

(Dramatic wave of the
hand.)
"Can't I just....
give my OPINION?"
(Chin up.)
"I am an AMERICAN,
You KNOW."

[PATIENT RUMBLE.]

"HEY!
Ya wan'me to
TALK ta' YOU!
I'm TALKIN'!"

[LISTEN TO A SWEET
MELODY COMING
FROM A CHOIR PRACTICE,
IN SAN ANTONIO.]
[PATIENT NOD.]

"The SAME chapter,
that bans HOMOSEXUALITY...
PROMOTES INHUMANESS
to ANIMALS!"

[PATIENT GAZE,
AT ARGUMENTATIVE
CHILD FROM WEST
PHILADELPHIA.]

(Irritable squirm.)
"It just always seems
to ME, that....."

[PATIENT VOICE.]
"What,
Mein kin'der."

"....THAT....
You always...
FOCUS on all
the wrong THINGS!"

[PATIENT NODDING.]
[DROP SOME MORE
SNOW FLAKES OVER
PHILADELPHIA.]

"I mean....
ISN'T being KIND to
ANIMALS.....
more IMPORTANT,
than what some ADULT
DOES, in the privacy
of......"

[QUIET VOICE.]
"You don't know
Me,
child."

"But, I've READ a lotta
Your STUFF!"

[SIGH.]
"Perhaps,
Mein kin'der."

"Darn TOOT'UN,
I have!"

[SOLMEN NOD.]
[PAUSE.]
"Before you
toot your own
horn,
child......."

(Laugh!)
"Yeah?"
(Laughing.)
"What?"

"Read
some
more
of
My
Stuff."
*********************
And
you shall offer...
seven lambs...
one young bull...
and two rams...
one kid of the goats...
and two male
lambs...as a
sacrifice.
[Leviticus 23:18-19]

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