Stuck on Page 43
by Dr. Julie Ostrowski
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As a reader of books I know about pages. How some can seem like a short stream of thought, others a detailed "must read slow" type of page, and others, ones you must read four or five times to understand and "get it" before turning to the next page.
I recently came across a book I had trouble with a few times. I would be reading along enjoying the visual image it formed in my head and all of a sudden read a line or a paragraph that just didn't fit. I would stop, re-read it, scratch my head, re-read again to no avail. I would even back up to the last paragraph of the page before and start from there, thinking it would flow if I rewound the thought....no, that didn't work either. So I ended up putting the book down and walking away, stuck on page 43. I knew I would revisit it again later that day or even the next but needed to clear my head and sort it out. Sometimes this cycle can go on for a few days, all depending on the depth-ness of the book, eventually after a few frustrated attempts the light will come on and the flow begins to run again in perfect thought; but wow! What a time and effort it took to get to the next page!
Sometimes I think life hits you with a few sentences or paragraphs that do not flow into the certain stream of action, plan or routine you may have going. I have had plenty of those too. Both secular moments as well as spiritual ones. Frustration occurs on both accounts. It has taken some time, but I have come to realize when you are stuck on a spiritual page it most likely is for a good reason. Now don't get me wrong, I did not say it was good that you were stuck - there is a difference. But most likely than not, it means you have not learned what you needed to get to the other page. You keep wanting to press through it, to the next spiritual page without thinking too much or sorting the "not so easy" paragraphs out.. If this has happened to you at some time or another, then you are in good company.
Eventually, with all pages, even spiritual ones - you must pick it up again - take the time and energy to sort it through until you are ready (truly ready) to turn the page. If you try to skip the page - forget it! I have already tried to do that on occasions- I will spare you the trouble and warn you now, it never ends well.
When you try to skip a spiritual page and continue through, by the time you have reached the end you realize....sometimes with a great sigh....Yes, you know! It was for not! You come to realize it would be best to start from the beginning and do it right..
God wants you to enjoy each page, and grow with each passing paragraph so we will truly be able to turn the pages of our spiritual adventure. No, that does not mean pages do not contain hard things, or sadness; but if you read it with God those paragraph and pages also contain peace and comfort.
I encourage you (as well as myself), next time you find yourself stuck on page 43, take the time to sort it out before turning to the next page - it makes for a much better and more fulfilling read. You won't regret it!
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