Lessons God is trying to teach me
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When I thought of lessens God is trying to teach me I tried to come up with some that are recent and since I have been having difficulties with these this week. These are respecting authorities and not gossiping.
The one about respecting authorities comes out both at home and at the mental health day treatment center that I attend almost daily. I'll start at home, our house is unsupervised which means if have problems that need staffs input we either wait for a house meeting or call and leave a message on her phone. Staff has rules that technically we are all supposed to observe I get rebellious, I have been told numerous times that I am not allowed to eat in my room and yet I continue to do it. I just make sure I remove all dishes and pop cans from my room before staff arrives for house meeting. At day treatment I get into trouble because at times my friends will ask me questions that should be given to a staff member. This happens because I am one of the clients that is more along in my recovery than others, they ask like I am an authority at day treatment when I am not I am just one of them. I am learning to say to myself and others “Go ask staff, I am not staff.”
Gossip is also difficult because at the day program my friends and I are like a family. When I know that one of my friends is having a hard time and they are not in the center sometimes I get concerned and ask friends to contact them. This is considered a breach of confideintiality, but God knows I say what I am saying to try to get the person peer support. We used to have a consumer advocacy group years ago which I lead. I am learning with great difficulty not to say things until I think first, and to not say things even though it might help another person. My motives are correct I just go about things in the wrong way. AA has a terrific motto, it is “Who you see here and what you hear here stays here.” I also have to remember that if I didn’t have issues around mental health problems I would not be coming into day treatment.
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