Be a Better Writer--ONOMATOPOEIA
Posted: Sat Jan 16, 2016 9:50 am
ONOMATOPOEIA
Onomatopoeia is a word for a sound—specifically, it is a word that sounds very much like the actual sound that it names. Do you remember teaching your children animal sounds? Meow, caw, quack, oink…those are all examples of onomatopoeia. Those of you of a certain generation will recall the television show Batman, with Adam West—remember the frames that would pop up during his confrontations with the villains? Bam, pow, thwack! There are sounds all around you: tick-tock, vrrrrroooom, beep, tappity-tappity, rrrrrrrring. If it’s a word meant to represent a sound, it’s onomatopoeia.
I’ve mentioned many times that poets have more tools in their toolbox than simply meter and rhyme—that the best poets choose words for their sounds and for their effect on the reader. Onomatopoeia is one of those poetic tools that poets should consider using.
Here’s a little bit from David McCord’s poem “The Pickety Fence”.
…Give it a lick
Give it a lick
Give it a lick
With a rickety stick
pickety
pickety
pickety
pick
See how the words actually sound (if read aloud) like the sound of running alongside a picket fence with a stick?
In Alfred Noyes’s “The Highwayman,” there’s a stanza that features a wonderful example of onomatopoeia:
Tlot-tlot, tlot-tlot! Had they heard it? The horse-hoofs ringing clear;
Tlot-tlot, tlot-tlot, in the distance? Were they deaf that they did not hear?
Down the ribbon of moonlight, over the brow of the hill
The highwayman came riding,
Riding, riding!
The red-coats looked to their priming! She stood up, straight and still!
As you see, a poem may consist almost entirely of onomatopoeia, or it may use it sparingly, as a sound effect in a narrative, for example.
In prose, you’re far more likely to use onomatopoeia only as a sound effect—the distant gunshot, the phone ringing, the grumbling of a hungry cat.
Here’s a little quiz for you. Take a look at these pairs of passages:
A. Ring! Ring! Jan was awakened by the insistent telephone.
Jan was awakened by the insistent ringing of the telephone.
B. Knock, knock! Finally her date had arrived.
Jan was beginning to think her date would never come, when she finally heard a knock at the door.
In each of those sets, which passage do you prefer? I’ll bet you think that since I’m dealing with onomatopoeia, I’ll say the first passage is preferable—but you’d be wrong. In general, Jan’s Rule of Onomatopoeia is this: the less an onomatopoeic word actually sounds like the word it represents, the less you should use it as onomatopoeia. In the examples above, using knock and ring as I’ve used in the first sentence of each pair makes my writing sound immature and amateurish. That’s because the word knock doesn’t really sound like a knocking at the door, nor does the word ring sound like a doorbell.
On the other hand:
C. The rotten tomato fell at my feet with a splat.
D. There was a swish, then a whump. The bride landed at the foot of the stairway.
In prose, I think onomatopoeic words are better used as nouns (C and D, above) than as interjections (A and B).
There’s no standard rule about this, but when writing prose, I recommend that you put onomatopoeia in italics. It seems to help the reader to perceive those words as sounds, rather than as regular words. But don’t put verbs like ringing and knocked in italics—only use the italics when the word is truly used to represent a sound. (This recommendation may just be a style choice, but I’ve seen it many times. If you’re not sure, ask your editor or publisher if they have a preference.)
WRONG:
I tapped out a short story on my laptop.
RIGHT:
With a rapid tap-tappity-tap, the words of my story appeared on the screen.
HOMEWORK:
Poets, write eight lines or so that make use of onomatopoeic words. OR
Prose writers, write a few examples (like C and D above) showing how you might use onomatopoeia in your writing.
If you have a bit of onomatopoeia from your own writing that you’d like to share, feel free to like to it (or excerpt it) here. If you do this, please share a bit about your use of this device, and why you chose it.
If you have questions or comments about onomatopoeia, or ideas for future lessons, I’d love to hear them.
Onomatopoeia is a word for a sound—specifically, it is a word that sounds very much like the actual sound that it names. Do you remember teaching your children animal sounds? Meow, caw, quack, oink…those are all examples of onomatopoeia. Those of you of a certain generation will recall the television show Batman, with Adam West—remember the frames that would pop up during his confrontations with the villains? Bam, pow, thwack! There are sounds all around you: tick-tock, vrrrrroooom, beep, tappity-tappity, rrrrrrrring. If it’s a word meant to represent a sound, it’s onomatopoeia.
I’ve mentioned many times that poets have more tools in their toolbox than simply meter and rhyme—that the best poets choose words for their sounds and for their effect on the reader. Onomatopoeia is one of those poetic tools that poets should consider using.
Here’s a little bit from David McCord’s poem “The Pickety Fence”.
…Give it a lick
Give it a lick
Give it a lick
With a rickety stick
pickety
pickety
pickety
pick
See how the words actually sound (if read aloud) like the sound of running alongside a picket fence with a stick?
In Alfred Noyes’s “The Highwayman,” there’s a stanza that features a wonderful example of onomatopoeia:
Tlot-tlot, tlot-tlot! Had they heard it? The horse-hoofs ringing clear;
Tlot-tlot, tlot-tlot, in the distance? Were they deaf that they did not hear?
Down the ribbon of moonlight, over the brow of the hill
The highwayman came riding,
Riding, riding!
The red-coats looked to their priming! She stood up, straight and still!
As you see, a poem may consist almost entirely of onomatopoeia, or it may use it sparingly, as a sound effect in a narrative, for example.
In prose, you’re far more likely to use onomatopoeia only as a sound effect—the distant gunshot, the phone ringing, the grumbling of a hungry cat.
Here’s a little quiz for you. Take a look at these pairs of passages:
A. Ring! Ring! Jan was awakened by the insistent telephone.
Jan was awakened by the insistent ringing of the telephone.
B. Knock, knock! Finally her date had arrived.
Jan was beginning to think her date would never come, when she finally heard a knock at the door.
In each of those sets, which passage do you prefer? I’ll bet you think that since I’m dealing with onomatopoeia, I’ll say the first passage is preferable—but you’d be wrong. In general, Jan’s Rule of Onomatopoeia is this: the less an onomatopoeic word actually sounds like the word it represents, the less you should use it as onomatopoeia. In the examples above, using knock and ring as I’ve used in the first sentence of each pair makes my writing sound immature and amateurish. That’s because the word knock doesn’t really sound like a knocking at the door, nor does the word ring sound like a doorbell.
On the other hand:
C. The rotten tomato fell at my feet with a splat.
D. There was a swish, then a whump. The bride landed at the foot of the stairway.
In prose, I think onomatopoeic words are better used as nouns (C and D, above) than as interjections (A and B).
There’s no standard rule about this, but when writing prose, I recommend that you put onomatopoeia in italics. It seems to help the reader to perceive those words as sounds, rather than as regular words. But don’t put verbs like ringing and knocked in italics—only use the italics when the word is truly used to represent a sound. (This recommendation may just be a style choice, but I’ve seen it many times. If you’re not sure, ask your editor or publisher if they have a preference.)
WRONG:
I tapped out a short story on my laptop.
RIGHT:
With a rapid tap-tappity-tap, the words of my story appeared on the screen.
HOMEWORK:
Poets, write eight lines or so that make use of onomatopoeic words. OR
Prose writers, write a few examples (like C and D above) showing how you might use onomatopoeia in your writing.
If you have a bit of onomatopoeia from your own writing that you’d like to share, feel free to like to it (or excerpt it) here. If you do this, please share a bit about your use of this device, and why you chose it.
If you have questions or comments about onomatopoeia, or ideas for future lessons, I’d love to hear them.