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How Much Is Too Much?

General, open discussion regarding writing, getting published, markets, pointers, and other related topics. All are welcome! No advertising, please!

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How Much Is Too Much?

Postby Vile » Sun Mar 02, 2014 4:30 am

Heyo! I know I haven't posted here in a long time, but I've been working on the sequel/sister story to my novel The Raggedyman (Which can be bought on Amazon. I wrote under S.L. Whitaker as my pen name).

I'm diving into the rare territory of Urban Fantasy instead of horror this time around. I literally went to the funny farm after finishing The Raggedyman because putting my head in horror for 8 years straight really did something to my brain. This one is more along the lines of if Boondock Saints met Parasite Eve.

The book is called Lepers... the general theme is Biblical Leprosy VS. Black Magic. Through the ages, Tzaarath has evolved into an internal disease except in a few rare cases. This internal version of Tzaarath can attack the brain. Because it is a disease which is linked to the soul, if the body manages to fight off the disease, they can develop superhuman abilities depending on what part of the brain is being attacked. Because they are infected with a spiritual organism, they are immune to possession and valuable as soldier mutants against the rise of demonic activity.

One mutant can control the disease itself and his war against the gangs in Chicago turning to the occult instead of guns are the forefront of the story.

Number one... I haven't seen ANYONE use Tzaarath as a power source. I spend a lot of time in the beginning of the novel in a scene where the main character, Blake Berry, is getting informed about the disease and how to stop his charge in the event that he goes insane with his power (he acts as 'Superman's Bodyguard' and acts as Leper's mentor to turn him into a terror on the street). Is this long scene okay to describe the rules of the Tzaarath to the audience, or should I keep the disease a mystery?

Number two... I have two running romantic ties in the book, one of which is key to the story, the other is... a nice dilemma for Blake to be in to cause tension and test his faith. Is having more than one romantic plot device too much if the book is based off of action?

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Re: How Much Is Too Much?

Postby Arpy » Mon Mar 03, 2014 3:22 pm

My ten cents, for what they're worth:

No. 2
Definitely go ahead with a romantic twist. This won't usually detract from the story (as long as you don't go too prominent with it); rather it enhances your character, adds an extra dimension to the story, and hooks your readers by another thread. All good things! Two I think would be fine, especially if it's another challenge for the MC. But it depends on how long you're planning -- it may end up being something you have to cut out to keep the word count down.

No. 1
I'm not sure what to say, but I usually go by the policy "only tell the readers what you absolutely have to" (then, I'm trying to cut down a 110,000 word novel to 100,000 or less. Also, my beta readers do tell me I take their intelligence too much for granted sometimes :lol:) So, in short, I would say leave the disease a mystery if you can get away with it. Definitely get input from beta readers to see if it works.

I write adventures, historical fiction, war stories, fantasies, psychological and spy thrillers.

Snaga - fan fiction fantasy
Emira - action adventure
Confessions of an Evil Genius - psychological thriller
The Play-Actor - sci-fi, historical, psychological spy thriller
Dreamreader - YA psychological thriller
A fantasy without a title
Royal Opposition - action adventure

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Re: How Much Is Too Much?

Postby deejay » Mon Mar 03, 2014 3:30 pm

Welcome back, Vile!

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Re: How Much Is Too Much?

Postby buckspub » Mon Mar 03, 2014 8:13 pm

Post content deleted by user.
Last edited by buckspub on Sun Mar 23, 2014 2:44 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: How Much Is Too Much?

Postby Vile » Thu Mar 06, 2014 2:54 pm

Oh thanks! I've been real busy with my marketing for Raggedyman, so I haven't touched the critique circle in a long time. I can get back on there, though. This place has really supported my work even though it hasn't been mainstream Christian, so I want to support this place as much as possible.

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