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Norwegian Math Test...
Verks 4 me.
A Norwegian Math Test --- This only works for those in Minnna soda , Nort DaKoda, or Viskonsin dont cha know!
Ole, a Norwegian fella wants a job, but the foreman doesn't want to hire him, so he says he won't hire him until he passes a little math test. Here is your first question, the foreman said. 'Without using numbers, represent the number 9.'
'Witout numbers?' The Norwegian says, 'Dat's easy.' and proceeds to draw three trees.
What's this?' the boss asks.
Vot! You got no brain? Tree and tree and tree make nine,' says the Norwegian.
'Fair enough,' says the boss. 'Here's your second question. Use the same rules, but this time represent the number 99.'
The Norwegian stares into space for a while, then picks up the picture that he has just drawn and makes a smudge on each tree. 'Dar ya go!'
The boss scratches his head and says, 'How on earth do you get that to represent 99?'
'You must be from Iowa. Each of Da trees is dirty now. So, it's dirty tree, and dirty tree, and dirty tree. Dat is 99.'
The boss is getting worried that he's going to actually have to hire this Norwegian, so he says, 'All right, last question. Same rules again, but represent the number 100.'
The Norwegian fella stares into space some more, then he picks up the picture again and makes a little mark at the base of each tree and says, 'Dar ya go! Von hundred!'
The boss looks at the attempt. 'You must be nuts if you think that represents a hundred!'
The Norwegian winces and shakes his head. UFF-DAH! you must be a Finlander from Iowa; he leans forward and points to the marks at the base of each tree and says, 'A little dog come along and pooped by each tree. So now you got dirty tree and a turd, dirty tree and a turd, and dirty tree and a turd, and dat makes von hundred !!
So, ven do I start
Alabama: At Least We're not Mississippi
Alaska: 11,623 Eskimos Can't be Wrong!
Arizona: But It's a Dry Heat
Arkansas: Litterasy Ain't Everthing
California: As Seen on TV
Colorado: If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother
Connecticut: Like Massachusetts, Only Dirtier and With Less Character
Delaware: We Really Do Like the Chemicals in our Water
Florida: Ask Us About Our Grand kids
Georgia: We Put the "Fun" in Fundamentalist Extremism
Hawaii: Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru (Death to Mainland Scum, But Leave Your Money )
Idaho: More Than Just Potatoes... Well Okay, We're Not, But The Potatoes Are Real Good
Illinois: Please Don't Pronounce the "S"
Indiana: 2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free
Iowa: We Do Amazing Things With Corn
Kansas: First Of The Rectangle States
Kentucky: Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names
Louisiana: We're Not All Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That's Our Tourism Campaign
Maine: We're Wicked Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster
Maryland: A Thinking Man's Delaware
Massachusetts: Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden's (For Most Tax Brackets )
Michigan: First Line of Defense From the Canadians
Minnesota: "10,000 Lakes and 10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 Mosquitoes"
Mississippi: Come Feel Better About Your Own State
Missouri: Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars at Work
Montana: Land of the Big Sky, the Unabomber, Right-Wing Crazies and Very Little Else
Nebraska: Ask About Our State Motto Contest
Nevada: Whores and Poker! New Hampshire: Go Away and Leave Us Alone
New Jersey: Ya Wanna ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto Right Here!
New Mexico: Lizards Make Excellent Pets
New York: You Have the Right to Remain Silent, You Have the Right to an Attorney...
North Carolina: Tobacco is a Vegetable
North Dakota: We Really are One of the 50 States!
Ohio: We Wish We Were In Michigan
Oklahoma: Like the Play, only No Singing
Oregon: Spotted Owl... It's What's For Dinner
Pennsylvania: Cook With Coal
Rhode Island: We're Not REALLY An Island
South Carolina: Remember the Civil War? We Didn't Actually Surrender
South Dakota: Closer Than North Dakota
Tennessee: The Educashun State
Texas: Si' Hablo Ing'les (Yes, I speak English )
Utah: Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus
Virginia: Who Says Government Stiffs and Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix?
Washington: Help! We're Overrun By Nerds and Slackers!
Washington, D.C.: Wanna Be Mayor?
West Virginia: One Big Happy Family-Really!
Wisconsin: Eat Cheese or Die
deejay wrote:As to the "Greg" episode, I think that guy was casing your house for a robbery/burglary, and was waiting for you to leave so he could break in. His being a PI was just an excuse to cover himself.
The new state motto for California just about sums it up. I still can't understand why they show California tourism ads on TV when we live in California; maybe they're trying to get Californians to leave home and actually see what else the state has to offer. If so, those ads don't scratch the surface. There is so much more to California than missions, beaches, mountains, Holly-weird, etc..
RiversidePeace wrote:Well, today is Norm and my 33rd wedding anniversary and we are about to leave for the city where we'll spend the weekend. We haven't been into Sydney City for some years so we have a lot of tourist stuff to do.
Back on line Monday.
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