Wow,..my heart goes out to you. Although I am a 'rhyme-y' poet ( I must have ending words that sound alike ) I felt your suffering and pain. A poem or story should cause the reader to feel what the writer is trying to convey, and you did this. If the Lord gave you this poem/prayer to help you put your feelings into words, then He has heard you and will deliver you at least from your part in this family ordeal. As King David wrote in the Pslams, "Create in me a clean heart, Oh Lord,..." It was a humble cry from one who knows he cannot do anything on his own, but must depend on God entirely. This is how I put it when I was going through a growing spurt;
by donna edgar 1-1-2012
As I reflect on all my yesteryears; the laughter,
the joy, the pain and it's tears.
The Bridges I built; well, some were torn down
and some of them vanished with barely a sound.
Mingled blessings with heartache return to my mind.
Should I live with regrets or reach forward in time?
If I had to do it over, what would I have changed?
I believe my priorities would have been re-arranged.
The Old Man should have become less,
My tongue should have spoken only to bless.
I should have listened to the Spirit's call;
His instructions were clear and without flaw.
But I cannot undo my yesteryear's mess, I can only
ask the Lord to forgive as I humbly confess.
Looking back will really do no good, so I will try,
with prayer to do as I should.
I will commit my life and all that is in me,
to live without bitterness, strife and envy.
Perhaps I have learned when I make my choice,
to listen and harken to the Savior's voice.
Writing what I was going through helped me in so many diffrent ways, no matter what the other people did or said, I am the one who had to own "MY" part and making it right with God was my top priority. Good job on your first attempt. God bless on future writings.~ Donna~