The use of the word "I" in a testimony writing

[rtodd5011]

It seems I am stuck. while writing my testimony out, I realized that Im using the word "I" too much. Is there anyway to get around this structurally? Thanks for any help and grammar advise.

Richard

[pheeweed]

I try to change the structure of the sentence. For example, instead of:

I was depressed.

I would write:

Feelings of depression were overwhelming.

Not a very good example, but maybe you can see the point. I also try to use the rules that make good fiction because they also will make good non-fiction. Spend some time reading Jan's column if you haven't already and look for things like words that end in ly and telling instead of telling. My general writing has improved by working on those kinds of things.

I hope this helps.
Phee

[glorybee]

Since a testimony is by definition a first person narrative, it's quite fine to use the word "I". Perhaps you're worried because you're used to academic writing, in which the word "I" is discouraged. If that's the case, don't worry; no such rule applies to testimonies.

Or you may be concerned that too many sentences are beginning with "I". That's a legitimate concern, but it's fairly easy to work around. Just do some restructuring of the sentence.

Ex. I fell to my knees, weeping.

Weeping, I fell to my knees.

I didn't understand how God could love me.

It was incomprehensible--why would God love someone like me?

I opened my Bible, looking for comfort.

Hoping for comfort, I opened my Bible.

Does this help? If not, let me know, and I'll try again.

jan

[Shann]

I am the reason to blame for being nervous about using the word I too much. When reading an article I commented about how many times each sentence began with I and then gave suggestions that would cut down on it by restructuring them. I didn't mean to suggest you should never use the word I, but to mix it up so the reader doesn't get bogged down.

[rtodd5011]

Actually I had wrote my testimony out in December. back then before I had joined faithwriters, It bothered me that I used I too much. Now im trying to reword it not using I so much, thanks for all your suggestions, I appreciate you all. You are right Jan, there are way too many of the sentences in my testimony that began with the word I. I will work on rewording it and let you all know how that goes.

Richard

[Shann]

Oh good, thanks for mentioning that. I was worried that maybe I had discouraged you!

[lish1936]

Actually I had wrote my testimony out in December. back then before I had joined faithwriters, It bothered me that I used I too much.
Richard

Richard,

From one writer to another, those pesky, extra words can get in the way. "Wrote" and "joined" will do just fine without any help from "had."

"I wrote...I joined."



Blessings,

Lillian

Lillian

[rtodd5011]

Thanks Lillian, im new at writing for these contests, so any help is appreciated. I feel the need to brush up on my grammar, so thanks Shann, im not discouraged im glad for the extra help. Critiqueing is new to me, it tough but i dont mind it.


Richard