The perfect place for general chat (non-writing related). Please, no political discussions.
Well, if anyone cares to know on the names I have decided with they are as follows.
Simon and Autumn Rose Reeves, daughter Maddison and son Wyatt.
Nicholas McKenzie Avery and Winter Lily Avery, later in an Epilogue they have a child with the mother's maiden last name which will either be Nolan or Ellis. I haven't decided if i want them to have a boy or girl..
Spring Jasmine Nolan or Ellis (Winter and Spring have the same dad: Robert Ellis or Nolan)
Summer Violet Ramirez (her dad is spanish: Javier Ramirez)
So I guess I am not 100% decided on all the names lol
boy, girl..boy, girl....
Robert Ellis...Robert Nolan... Winter Lily Ellis...Winter Lily Nolan...Spring Jasmine Ellis...Spring Jasmine Nolan....boy...girl..boy...girl!?!?!?!?!
My sisters got bullied really badly by cousins when we were growing up, too, and their parents wouldn't do anything about it when my parents tried to intervene. Some of the parents even pitted their kids against my sisters on purpose. We had to pull back from some of that family, too. Sad thing to have to do, but sometimes it's necessary. (For some reason the cousins my age weren't as mean as the older ones)
Glad you figured out at least some of the names, Tiara! Names are so important and such a big part of their characters and how things get played out, I find. I like the names.
Pup, hope your friend's surgery went well.
My hearing was totally a miracle. The judge had the option of asking for a medical expert or not. He requested one and the person who happened to be next on the list to get called as an expert was very familiar with connective tissue disorders and he knew of and highly respected my specialist back east! He went through my chart notes and commented positively on almost all the things my lawyer had been worried about. He said my medical file backed up my specialist's diagnosis and said she knew her stuff so if she thought I was disabled then I was.
The judge was like, "Oh, okay then. Case closed." He only asked me two basic questions and didn't talk to the vocational expert at all. After the hearing was officially over he told us that was the first time he'd ever heard that medical expert say anyone was disabled. I still can't quite believe how smoothly it went.
I'm particularly tired and sore tonight, so noticing what a dubious honor this is, but still is an answer to prayer. I'm hoping with the medical insurance help I'll be able to get the orthotics I need for my collapsed ankles and get my gum surgery and continue to do the myotherapy that helps my pain some, and stuff like that.
Yeah, Amy they were always like that but its a longer story too. But my Aunt instigates it too but then she's the first one that gets depressed if she isn't treated right (apparently she was ignored by her family at the wedding and she's depressed now) but my other Aunt she knew about my cousins treating me badly but she never did anything and now regrets that she didn't do anything. I guess she thought it would blow over or stop.
Oh Tiara, I like the names you chose. Especially Jasmine. A part from Aladin I'd never heard the name before but it is a pretty name.
Dum Spiro Spero
Personally I like Festus but it does bring to mind the dirty old dude on Gunsmoke!
Becky I know you are hurt by the rift in your family but I beg you to really think before making such a drastic decision. Sometimes when people hurt you, it is important to distant yourself from them but declaring them out of your family is only going to hurt you, not them. It's not good to keep that seed of anger growing because before you know it, it'll be overgrown all around you and you precious one will get choked by that tiny seed that grows into a huge prickly weed.
When my Mom died, my dad got involved with a crafty manipulative person and now even though he is alive and lives less than 15 miles from me we have no relationship at all. He has done some out-of-character things and she has abused him physically and mentally. It came to the point where things were so awful I did need to stop trying to reach out. I do say it feels like the Dad I knew for most of my life died when Mom died. Though I don't reach out too much(M did invite them to the wedding) I can't give her any room to plant seeds in my heart.
The thing is even though you may have an idea why they don't seem to like you, it's hard to know what's really going on deep in their heart. Even if they list reasons, it doesn't mean they are true reasons. They may not even know why. But by declaring them no longer family, you might find it will backfire on you in the future. I'm reminded every so often that we are to pray for those who hurt us and it's not an easy thing to do. But prayer has incredible power and a way of changing things in a way we can never imagine. Try to give your pain and anger to God and then pray for them. I say this not because I believe they deserve another chance but because I believe you do. Kill them with kindness can be a petty thing or it can be something that helps you to heal and not give them a chance to claim victory over you. I'm so sorry that you're hurting right now and wish my words could make a difference. We all have family problems and all have to decide if it's better for us to keep our distance. I think you should stay back so you don't get hurt again but just don't close the door completely God needs it opened even a crack to heal your pain.
I'm glad you got the names figured out Tiara. Non-writers may not understand it but the names are so important and our characters will tell us if we named them wrong. Wrigley's brother was named Max and Gage before I settled on Camden. Even when Deb told me not to use the name Wrigley in the challenge but I could still use the character but name her something else. It was almost impossible to do. She didn't quite have the same personality as a Wrigley would. After all parents who would name their kids after baseball parks have to be a tad wacky (speaking of Tad Wacky, I miss you Cynthia) and the fact that Wrigley holds her head up high when the kids call her chewing gum speaks a lot about her character. Because her name is Wrigley that impacted her personality. Anyone ever wonder if they'd be the same if they had a different name?
Less than 24 hours to get your challenge stories in said the nag (Nnnn- eeeee-iiigh) I think I finally came up with an idea now I just need to get it from head to paper or screen or whatever!
Thanks Shann but I think this is what I need. Either way i'm going to be angry because whats going to happen is i do this and cut them out and be angry or i forgive, they do it again, i be angry and the process continues. I'm not willing to even try anymore because i have so many times. Besides, I can't make people my family that never have been. Family doesn't treat people that way and considering they've treated me this way for YEARS they have NEVER been my family.
Dum Spiro Spero
I just hate seeing you hurt so bad. I do understand because my dad changed into an entirely different person. He even accused me of breaking into the house and stealing the dinnerware of Mom's that was already promised to me. Also my brother used to really have problems with me and Mom. He was jealous, I think was part of it but he believed that Mom and Dad paid for my college and my first house. Since he had problems he never had much money and when at 23 I bought my own house he couldn't understand how a single mom could afford to do such a thing. Well one night he wanted Dad to help him with something but Dad had already committed himself to helping me. My brother got really mad and the next day called me just as I was leaving to teach Sunday School. He told me he hates me and that he has always hated me and will always hate me. I'd asked him to be an usher in our wedding and after he told me he hated me he said he wouldn't be in my wedding for any amount of money. (It was only a few weeks before the wedding too) It was horrible. He kind of apologized before the wedding but didn't mean it I think my dad made him in order to get Dad's help he agreed but when my wedding came he was a no-show. It really hurt my feelings. His wife and my nephews and nieces came and his wife said that my brother was mad at her and stormed off (which I thought was super sweet of her and still do give her respect for that.) Any way 10 months later Mom died suddenly at the age of 57. My brother really struggled with all of the mean things he had said to her in the past. Mom and I were super close and had similar personalities while my brother and sister were closer to Dad. My brother did come to me and said that he wanted to make things right with me because he never wanted to feel like he did at Mom's funeral. I give him a lot of credit for apologizing. It wasn't easy for him. Then a few years later I was on some medicine for the chronic pain and one of the side effects were suicidal ideations (they didn't know it then though) and I suffered for almost a year where I tried to kill myself almost every week. My brother has had mental health problems pretty much his whole life and he was probably one of the few people who really got through to me. I can remember seeing him tear up and beg me to stop trying to hurt myself. Even now I'm getting all teary. He really cared and though things didn't get better until the doctors finally got afraid enough that I would succeed in my attempts and took me off every single med I was on. Well within 4 weeks it was all out of my system and the suicidal thoughts went away as quickly as they came.
I didn't mean to pour out my whole life story but I wanted you to know that I do get it. Though I don't know what is going on in your cousin's mind, I know you are hurting and angry and that hurts me because I do care about you. Letting go of anger and hurt is harder and it's even harder to leave it in god's hand once you give it to him which is why people will take it back but Jesus will hold it for you and if you diligently pray and ask him no matter how hard I try to take back that burden don't let me Jesus, it will make your heart lighter. I'm, not saying you'll never feel the sting again but when it does come around you need to proclaim I gave this burden to Jesus and I refuse to take it back! If you can try to do that I know your reward will blow your mind. It won't be easy as you, like me, have a sensitive heart and when people hurt us the cut is deep and leaves huge scars but once our hands are free from carrying that burden of anger, fear, and pain we open ourselves up to be available to carry other things--wonderful things.
I will try to not nag you about it again. only you know all of the details (and Jesus) but I want you to know I'm in your corner and if you ever need a soft place to land I am here for that too. There is so much I hope and dream for you and wish I could help you find a way to have those hopes and dreams but for now I'm praying that you can protect your heart from the pain in a healthy way and I do love you!
Forgiving doesn't mean you have to be around them all the time anymore. Like Shann said and like we did with my family, you can distance yourself and be taking care of yourself. With the cousins and aunts who were harmful to us, we still see them at family reunion stuff, but we're just polite and don't try to be close or anything and we don't invite them to anything other than really major things like weddings and they don't invite us to anything either.
So how is it going for the Blessed event? Or I guess I should say blessed topic. What is a blessed event a wedding? The blessed event is Jesus' birth so maybe the blessed event is a birth. Anyone write a story yet? I have one rumbling through my mind but not sure if I'll have the energy to write it. Maybe one of you technical geeks err I mean people out there invite a tape recorder for my thoughts? Boy would homeland security run wild with that one...speaking of that how about the election? Ooohh that was weird right as I typed that I got one of those annoying poll calls where they want to know if I'll commit to voting so and so. Really I have a hard enough day just keeping up with life and making sure my underwear matches my clothes and they expect me to know who I am voting for?? I told Amy I was going to close my eyes and pick well that sent her on a right fancy tirade. She went on and on and on about how that was irresponsible and when I responded that irresponsible is not matching your underwear to your clothes! Well I guess i made my point cuz all she did id say Humph well I'm not really sure she said that as we were txting at the time but I'm positive I heard a very loud humph come from the West. And who else would be humphing me? And you guys wonder why I don't like coffee or chocolate?!!
I have been absent for a few weeks...just busy life, as usual. I think I caught up all the pages, and I laughed, Shann, at the multip story.
My friend Shawna moved down here a month ago and has been living about 40 minutes southeast of us in Newport Beach. She lived with me back in '06 and was in my wedding. Over the last two weeks we've been able to catch up a bit, but now she's moving back to WA. I guess her housemates invited her to come and stay and do ministry with them, knowing she didn't have rent money and a job, and now that she hadn't yet gotten a job, insisted that she leave by this weekend. They were all about "living in faith" but apparently their faith ran out this week. She's coping with it okay, but it makes me mad. God wants us to trust Him, yeah, but He also wants us to be wise. I think she should have raised the money first and tried to find a job online or long distance so she'd be established when she got here. They're all YWAMers, though, where the philosophy is just try stuff out and if God doesn't provide then it must not be His will. I'm bummed to lose my friend; let's be real. We'll be okay, but it kind of sucks. And though I know her housemates and enjoyed meeting up with them a couple weeks ago, this whole experience sours me on seeing them again. Which is a bummer because it's nice to have old friends sometimes.
Anyways besides that I've been working and baking. And I'm back to counting points with Weight Watchers and in three weeks I dropped all the weight I gained over the summer. I'm also realizing how fattening are the baked goods I've been making...which is probably what contributed to those extra pounds. To make up for high points days I've been working out more, and tonight we bought DDR for the Wii which definitely burns some calories! I'm all about having more fun when I exercise because I despise exercising for its own sake.
If you could lift up a prayer for me, I'm struggling with not wanting to go to work because of some bad experiences lately and general work politics (I work in an all-women environment). I worry about how I am perceived (competent or not) and if I will get enough hours. With Ryan out of work we are completely dependent on my job to pay the bills. Plus we have no family here. I have been feeling very tired over the last several months and I know it's from pouring myself into working hard and extra whenever I can. I know I need to give my fears to God, and I am trying, but my faith is definitely being stretched. Mostly I just would like to not have dread when I go to work. I love my job but I haven't been able to enjoy it lately.
I am going to try to write something for the Challenge. I have 6.5 hours left, which should be enough.
Glad to hear of all the good news; good to see some old friends; and praying for those who need a lift.
My FW Profile
Praise God. I am so happy for you, definitely one burden reduced.
Where do you think I got it from.
Bummer deal about the friend Leah, and also work. Having work these days is rough all around. Meself.. I do my job good, but get no recognition either way, good or bad. Sometimes I almost feel like a slave that is over looked. I wonder, if I did something wrong would they notice.. or even care?
Will add a prayer for ya.
#43 on me list of odd things to do.. ride a hot-air balloon over the mountains at sunrise. (Always have wanted to do that)
Of course that would mean being up there all night, or going up in the dark before dawn. Then too spending a few days in a balloon could be fun as well, as long as I had satellite connection it would a cool way to travel.
Last edited by JesusPuppy on Thu Oct 18, 2012 9:37 am, edited 1 time in total.
Hey.. I like Fester. He was cool. Not a cool as Wednesday when she smiled, but still.
Thanks, JP. The one thing that sucks about being a rich American is that we are kind of slave to the system. If we were out of debt I would seriously consider moving somewhere like the South Pacific where we could live off the land and just work as needed to supplement our lifestyle. We do try to have fun in the middle of the grind, though. I appreciate being Lutheran now, because Luther had all kinds of encouragement for people in daily life. God blesses us as we submit all of our lives to Him.
Okay, Shanny, I did try to write something, but I got sleepy and dozed off while I was trying to figure out the ending. It's too late now to submit for real, but I may revise the piece when my brain is clearer. I still am not satisfied with the way the piece is leaning, and I still need a solid ending. It was a good exercise, though. Maybe I'll send it off to you for ideas.
Going to bed now, though. Got to get up in the early afternoon for a massage before work.
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Madder than a wet hen this morning. Got up at 5:00 a.m. as usual, refined my entry, pondered a title... AND PROMPTLY FORGOT TO SUBMIT IT! Grrrrrrr... The good news, however, is that I took third place in the Intermediate level. First time there, so the blow of not getting this week's entry in didn't hit as hard as it could have. That's called... live and learn!
Last edited by lauralnm on Thu Oct 18, 2012 10:42 am, edited 1 time in total.
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