I was wondering how I could possibly respond to this; what a weight this must be on you, physically, emotionally and spiritually.
Then my eyes glimpsed the post above yours, from Cynthia, and her 'blurb' at the bottom of her message -
Jeremiah 29:11" For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
I know this verse is bandied around to the point of almost becoming cliche; but I just wanted to reassure you to stay strong. I know you are a person of immense faith and trust in God, but even the strongest of saints needs encouragement. I will be praying for you, for strength, wisdom, peace and a massive influx of faith.