Southern Porch Extension

[Evensong]

Ah...diet facts, Mariane?...let's see...

1) Pickles are supposed to curb your appetite, but....I had a teacher friend who decided to do the pickle diet and then couldn't understand why her hands and feet etc were so puffy. All that pickle salt was holding water in her system!

2) I heard on TV today that drinking ice water dulls a person's appetite.

3) Eat slowly.

4) Put your fork down between each bite.

5) Only eat at the table. No eating in front of the TV.

6) Linda Owen should be doing all this but isn't. Do what Evensong says, not what she does.

[ready2go]

Kilos are equal to how many pounds?

I'm making a list of diet facts and observations:

The average person gains 8 pounds between Thanksgiving and New Years.

If you go to bed hungry, you'll lose 1 pound overnight. No kidding.

The less you eat, the less you'll want to eat. Definitely true.

(Any more truisms you want to add about gaining and losing weight? Feel free.)

'

Since it's always a worthy goal to strive to be average (or above), then the 8 pounds gained should be considered an accomplishment. Anything less would label us as under-achievers. Right?

So...bring on the fudge!

Don

[Deb Porter]

From past experience:

Only eat until you feel that first sense of being full--then stop! That's the one I tend to get wrong.

Always park in the spot furthest from the shopping centre.

Make sure you eat smaller meals, but have little snacks for morning and afternoon tea--but keep them healthy and small.

One of the worst things for me is that I often feel like a snack when I'm reading, so editing can be a killer for that.

Love, Deb

[BeachGrandma]

I wish someone would invent a pacifier for adults. That way when we're reading or watching television, we could chomp away on our raspberry or chocolate flavored pacifier and feel perfectly satisfied.

[Cassie]

looking up at the porch....at the rockers...the pets...wondering what in the world is going on! walking up the walk....taking the steps..... "Hi, I'm an outsider." You see, I just watched the Christi movies when she went to teach at Cutter's Gap. They didn't like outsiders. So...wondering 'bout you all.

"Couldn't help but overhear ya'. Who is Randolph Scott? And speaking of pickles and diets. I went to the doc a couple weeks ago, I was quite heavy and swollen. We talked about my eating habits and I told him I ate lots of dill pickles...everyday. He told me I must stop eating them. Now, I love them things, but I was good and didn't eat a one.

I went back to the doc today, even more puffed up. He said, 'Have you still been eating pickles?'

I said, 'Why no, doc, I haven't eaten a one just like you said, I just open the jars, throw the pickles away, and drink the juice.'

BTW, instead of using a pacifier, have you tried sucking on some of that pea gravel? It might work for ya'. Let 'em soak in some raspberries fer a while or that melted chocolate pile over there on the porch near George."

[BeachGrandma]

Cassie, WELCOME WELCOME WELCOME! Great to see ya. You're not an outsider! Once you step off the road and onto our rental house here in the country, you're already one of us! And once you walk up on the porch, we lock the screen door behind you to prevent your escape! So pull up a rocker, a porch swing, a hammock or even an old wash tub and make yourself at home. You'll likely have dogs and cats and some parrots jumping on your lap and on your shoulder but that goes with the territory. We don't charge extra for them slobbering all over you. That's one of our "compliments of the house" thingys.

Who is Randolph Scott? Some of us like old black and white westerns and he was popular several decades ago, way before our time. But whatta hunk! You put him on that stallion and watch him tear across the prairie chasin' down the bank robber in Wyoming and you've experienced the thrill of a lifetime!

I LOVE your story about the pickle juice. You probably drank a quart salt water! The things we do to peel off the pounds.

The rest of the crew has probably gone to bed but they'll be glad to see you in the morning. Great to see you, Cassie

Night night.

[Cassie]

Thanks for the fine welcome, Mariane. Before I sit down I just want to know one thing. You said, "...our rental house here in the country". Uhhh.....who's paying the rent? Might be a good thing to know before I make myself at home.

BTW, I'm used to lots of animals. We right now have 7 adult cats and 3 kittens in our house. Can I bring them here????

[BeachGrandma]

The rent is free, compliments of a well-known benefactor who was looking for Christian fellowship to subsidize. It doesn't cost us a thing and we can add anything our imaginations permit us to. We are all animal lovers and never turn down an animal for the porch. We take turns bringing in cyber food for them. So bring 'em on over and they'll have a porch full of new friends to play with and chase around the house!

Hugs

[SisJ]

Cassie, great to have you. Like Mariane said, you could never be an outsider. Can I have a kitten? Pretty please?

Verna, thanks. Thanks also for the prayer updates. My online experience is a bit limited these days, so I appreciate hearing what's going on in the forums I don't get to.

Deb, so nice to have you here! You know, rice cakes are not bad with nut butter and cinnamon, or with a little jam, or with cream cheese (since rice cakes have so few calories, you can get away with that even if you're counting them)... Oh, now I see Don said the something similar. Mariane, I don't know how you wash pots with rice cakes, seeing as they get all mushy and gooey when mixed with water... but maybe you use them dry; that could be a good strategy.

Teresa, good to have you here. The games you played with cousins sound like the ones I played with my sisters.

Linda, I so agree that the Southerners are fun to read and this thread is officially not worthless. If you get macchiatto at Starbuccs you need to spell it with lots of letters, but I'm not sure if I did it quite right.

Pam, I'm so glad you got a different job.

Laurie, preheated bed is great. Mom and I picked out an electric blanket for Amy so she can do that, too.

BettyDee, say hi to your parrot. Or you can say I said "j;ei' m,ejh4le .mgpy95 hy;r./' ,3.gku", since that's a little more like the messages the parrot pecks.

LOL, Deb, you must be a math person... we tend to just use 2.2 pounds per kilo and call that close enough. Mom had to weigh in kilos every morning when she was on dialysis, to decide what strength of solution to use that day, and the rest of us used her scale now and then so we got used to converting from kilos to pounds.

Dub, good to see you back once in a while when you can make it. Don't work *too* hard, okay?

I don't know what to vote on which thread to be the more active one; I just want to hang with Verna and Mariane and George and Tim and Linda and Dub and BettyDee and Don and Deb and Pam and Laurie and Joanney and Cassie and I don't even think I can type all the names, but you all know who you are and that I appreciate you each.

[raineysangel]

OK, I'm a little afraid of being locked in anywhere. Maybe I'll sit on this here tire swing out front to do my devotion this morning. It's early and the nearly full moon woke me up - shining really brightly - right in my face.

Sis J, you are so much more patient and observant than me. Bless you for takin' time to speak to everyone. I'm a little bit scatter-brained and will simply throw a "Hey ya'll" in through the screen door before I come over here and sit-a-spell.

I'm bringin' our community dog here with me. Ms. Lazy Daisy is an old blond lab who was the first to greet us at our new home here in LA (Lower Alabama). She comes from the farm across the road, but makes the rounds in our subdivision each day. She has claimed a rug on our back porch for her drifting bed. Yesterday, it had blown against a little table when she came up. She looked at me, looked at it, looked at me with big, sad brown eyes and made her point. I laid the rug back out and loved-on-her a little while. When I headed inside, she just laid right down for her daily nap. Don't worry 'bout her and -is it?- Ole Blue. She is quite fat and lazy. I'm pretty sure she cain't have no babies anymore anyway.

Anyway, I'm readin' 'bout the weeping prophet this mornin'. I'll just be in the tire swing over here for a little while with Lazy Daisy at my feet.

[BeachGrandma]

Morning everybody, especially the Newbies!!

Today is Dee's birthday and it just crept up on me. She's very concerned about her Dad who was in ICU the last I heard. Please pray for Dee and her family. And HAPPY BIRTHDAY, dear Dee. I doubt if you'll get to read this but we want to send you warm greetings anyway.

Here is our Birthday chart. If you newbies would like to fill in your birthdays, we'd love to be able to wish you a H.B. when your date rolls around. We usually give cyber gifts of food, crazy poems, recipes, anything to make you feel happy on your birthday.

Here's the list if you want to save it. (Let me know if any names should be deleted for one reason or another)

BIRTHDAYS

Jan 8th Lynne (Keleitha)
Jan 10 Dee
Jan 22 Shari
Jan 23 Deb Porter
Jan. 23 Pat
Mar 9 Mandy
Mar 17 Dub
Apri 24 Edy
June 26 Lenda
July 6 Linda
Aug 2 Carol
Aug 11 Laurie
Aug 13 SisJ
Sept 10 Joanney
Sept 16 Betty
Sept 16 Mariane
Nov 4 Verna
Nov 17 Don
Dec 6 George

I think I'll get a few more zzzzzz's. It's very early here.

Lvyu big time!

[ready2go]

We haven't heard from Joanney the past week and now I know why. Actually, she's been trying to pry the porch door open but it's still stuck shut for her. If we hear some heavy equipment out front, it's just Joanney ripping the door off its hinges.

I got this e-mail from her last night.

I have read all the wonderful posts on the Porch Extension but have been unable to join. Faithwriters is not accepting my login. i requested a new account and got the emails saying that was approved but it will not accept that one either. At least now it doesn't tell me my account name or password are incorrect. Now it just goes back to the boards as if I were signed in but it doesn't show me as signed in. If I try to post, it gives me the login screen. When I enter the login it gives it to me again.

Will one of you please post a hello to everyone on the Porch for me? I am sure enjoying the
camaraderie, but this laryngitis is making me feel antisocial.

Have a blessed day,
Joanney

Keep the porch light on for her and others...

Don

[Laurie]

I've eaten more rice cakes in the last few months than ever. I started reacting to flour - irritates my throat, and I'm rather fond of the idea of keeping my airway open. Weird, though, since it isn't related to wheat and it isn't related to gluten since I react the same to a gluten free flour mixture - and I can have other wheat as well as other gluten. Long story, but we think it's temporary. Sure hope so since I miss my toast, crackers, muffins and noodles that set well in this stomach of mine, plus there are already a lot of other foods I can't have. Anyway, can't have the flavored rice cakes because they have corn in them, and I'm allergic to corn. Not crazy about the texture, but I've discovered that if you toast them first, they're less styrofoamy. Anyway, I'm grateful rice cakes are available because I'm a little hard pressed as it is to figure out what to eat.

Hi, Cassie. Nice to see you here.

Linda, I'm glad to hear your back is improving.

BTW, my birthday is on Aug. 11.

[BeachGrandma]

Don, I received the same Email from Joanney and had planned on posting it this morning. I'm glad you got here first. Maybe Deb will have an idea about what Laurie might do when Deb comes online and hopefully drops by here.

Laurie, I added your birthday to our list and we're looking forward to giving you a big cyber party. When it gets closer to your birthday, we'll ask what your favorite foods are and bring tons of it to the porch for your party.

If any of you other newbies want to tell us when your birthday is, I'll be glad to list it also. This doesn't commit you to something you'd rather not be committed to. It's just a fun thing and someone to share your birthday with.

Speaking of birthdays, I read that when Margaret Thatcher celebrated her 77th birthday, of all the thousands of people who know her personally, only 4 people bothered to send her a birthday card. I guess people thought with her failing health she wouldn't know the difference but she did, and it hurt her deeply. How quickly people forget once you're out of power! She was (and still is) held in such high esteem that it's hard to imagine such an oversight happening.

Just finishing my coffee and toasted English muffin with cheese and broiled tomato slices on it. It's so good I want another one but my conscience says "You wouldn't dare!" So I won't.

Question: Do the English, Australians and Canadians eat English muffins?

[BettyDee]

Rice cakes...bamboo shoots under your fingernails...sort of the same thing, isn't it?

My favorite diet food is baked tortilla chips and salsa. Seriously. Not many calories and it's GOOD!

I'm also a big box/package reader. If you're watching your weight and want something sweet, the plain dark chocolate isn't a bad choice. Good fer ya, too.

If you're not, try this:

AUNT BETTY'S CHOCOLATE STRESS RELIEF COCKTAIL

Open about 10 Hershey bars and put them in an industrial-sized blender. Don't feel bad if you only end up with 5 or so to actually put in the blender. I understand that you had a stressful day and had to eat half of them.

Add two packages of semi-sweet chocolate chips. At this point, it's best to add at least one package of milk chocolate chips as well.

Dump in three or four or five or six, or whatever, packets of instant cocoa mix. While chocolate purists don't recommend using the kind with mini-marshmallows, I don't see the harm. If you like them, go ahead. It's your cocktail, and I'm not telling.

Pour in a whole bottle of chocolate syrup.

Add two giant scoops of chocolate ice cream. Add another scoop or two if your day was particularly stressful.

Put in some more chocolate syrup just to make sure everything will blend well together.

Add some chocolate milk. A quart is probably good. Blend it up. Use any setting you like. The point is to consume chocolate, not to actually get a nice smooth mixture.

No point in dirtying more dishes, either. Just drink it directly from the blender jar.

It's best to partake of this in the bed, because there's a very good chance you will fall into a chocolate coma immediately after drinking.

Aunt Betty has more recipes. You are warned.