Don and Mariane, I like the way you two think when it comes to cleaning.
Friends, I have something I would like your honest opinions on. It's long, so bear with me.
The funeral yesterday was well attended. I'm estimating there were about 300 people there, and it was held at our church, which is small. Normal seating capacity is about 175 - 200, so it was standing room only and people were spilling out the doorway. Don and I and his brother did not sit with the family because half the church was reserved for family from out of town. This young man had a lot of family, besides our niece's immediate family, which is also large.
We got there plenty early and were able to get a seat in the third row from the front, although there were already quite a few people there. After we had been there just a few minutes, Don's niece, who is also a sister of the widow of the young man who was killed, came in and sat down behind us. There are four girls in this family. One sister lives in MO and was not in attendance, but the remaining one did walk in and sit with the family. So, to back track a bit, before the family came in, I asked the sister sitting behind us, whom I'll call Susie, to sit in the pew with us, which she did with some reluctance. She was teary eyed and quite upset. She felt she was not welcome to sit with the family. You have to understand this family's dynamics are not your ordinary family dynamics. They have a history of on again, off again relationships and many rocky instances starting with when they were small. Their dad (Don's brother) is deceased, BTW, and their mom also lives in MO.
While trying to pay attention to the service, I did find myself trying to comfort Susie a few times. She talked to me a little bit about some current issues. Keep in mind we were whispering the whole time. I don't think anyone else heard anything we were saying. A friend of Susie's came in and sat in the pew in front of us and they also talked, but just a couple of times.
Because of the large number of people in attendance, there were a few people who did get up and walk around, but I didn't. I'm adding this to point out there were a few distractions during the service.
At one point, when Susie said something to me, then leaned forward and also said it her friend in front of us, the pastor's wife, who was sitting directly behind me, leaned up and tapped me on the shoulder. When I turned around, she pointed to the pastor who was talking and indicated we needed to be quiet.
This just did not sit well with me. In the first place, we are not children who needed to be scolded. It was a funeral, and my niece Susie was trying to cope with some issues. The pastor's wife had absolutely no idea what we were even talking about. Yes, I agree, it's the polite thing to do to listen to the speaker at a funeral, but I felt this circumstance was unusual. It angered me when she did it. I think I am going to speak to her and tell her if I distracted her, I am sorry, but then go on to explain what was happening. I actually don't think we were bothering her that much. As I said, we were whispering, and Don, who was sitting right beside me said he didn't hear us. Besides that, the whole thing was embarrassing since we were sitting near the front. I have no idea how many people saw the pastor's wife do this. And if it makes any difference, she's about ten years younger than I am.
Am I wrong in thinking it was inappropriate for her to shush us? I will take all opinions under advisement. Thanks, friends!
Last edited by BettyDee
on Tue Apr 08, 2014 1:55 pm, edited 1 time in total.
I'm Bound for the Promised Land