Nothing can separate me from my relationship with God. Absolutely nothing. I've staked my life on it, put all my chickens in one basket, would take it to the bank, and whatever else, to prove it,
But IF (and I want to emphasize IF, as in I.F., I should ever lose my faith, perish the thought, it will be because of my sewing machine. Not a certain person, not something I've stumbled over doctrinally, not because of an incident or accident or illness, none of these. Only one thing: the worst invention ever foisted on the human race with the pretense of helping poor, tired, old, innocent housewives like me: my Sears sewing machine.
Yesterday, after numerous attempts at sewing a seam (not a gown or tuxedo or man's suit, mind you, just a simple seam, the thingys that hold the bobbin fell out with all those parts that don't fit each other and were designed to harass and badger seamstresses since sewing machines were first invented by Adolph Hitler to drive the female half of the world C.R.A.Z.Y. !!!
I had lost my manual, so forget that. John refused to help after he drove the sewing machine needle through his first knuckle and his last nerve, and after an hour I went on YouTube for a tutorial which was taught by someone with a barely discernible foreign accent who kept saying, "I don't know the name of this part, but you get my drift." After the tenth time, I got her drift all right and she got some choice words from me before I shut her off.
Admittedly, I was short-changed when they passed out technology skills to newborns. I believe firmly every single appliance or machine, computer, whatever, should only have 2 buttons: Off and On. Nothing more!
My bobbin with lavender thread still sits on my counter, the seam still needs to be sewed up and I'm lying in the corner in a fetal position, sucking my thumb (the one that bled while I tried to force that bobbin in with my hammer), trying to decide how much to sell that dreadful sewing machine for.
"O Jesus, Jesus, dearest Lord, forgive me if I say
For very love, thy sacred name, a thousand times a day.
O Jesus, Lord, with me abide; I rest in Thee whate'er betide.
Thy gracious smile is my reward. I love, I love Thee, Lord.